Beyond the Beats

Chapter 28. Haunting

Mahreen ramp-walked towards us in her high heels, her grin getting brighter by each step. Behind her, Hriaan, Jiya, and Tejas followed. While Hriaan and Jiya were bickering about something, Tejas was looking at other students.

They stopped beside Mahreen, who started pulling my cheeks as soon as she saw me.

"So cute," Mahreen commented.

I let her do that for some time and stopped her as my cheeks had started hurting. I didn't understand what she found cute in me.

"Hey, Shorty." Hriaan patted my head.

I glanced at Jiya for help, and she scolded Hriaan and Mahreen to stop troubling me.

"You are such a spoil-sport, Jiya," Hriaan teased.

"How are you, Boomer?" Mahreen asked.

"I am fine, Mahreen, and my name is Bhoomi," I said. "Can you please not call me Boomer?"

Mahreen pouted. "Why not? It sounds so cute though - just like you."

"I don't like it," I replied.

"Really?" Tejas asked, and everyone looked at him as he fixed his stare on me.

I gave a short nod. I thought that Tejas would ignore me, and for the first time, I also wanted him to do so because I didn't want him to showcase how much he loathed me. What my inner voice had said in the morning kept echoing in my mind.

If Tejas didn't like me, and there was no reason for it too, then I should be happy to not come in contact with him at all. He is really honest and doesn't feel the need to hide his emotions - also, I shouldn't forget his blunt remarks.

I should just accept that I have no right to judge his personal preferences, and I am not even that close to him to ask him about my doubt. I am already aware of the gap between us which I foolishly felt like ignoring. Just because he is not behaving like I want him to, it doesn't mean that I should let my spirits down.

He is my role model and inspiration, so I think I should not cross my limits. Trying to crash into his personal life wasn't a good idea after all. So what if I was on the same team as him? It doesn't guarantee that I made a memorable impression on him or changed his views about me. I think that instead I made my image worse in his eyes.

Therefore, from this moment onwards, I will go back mentally, and remind myself to always be aware of my reality. The trainee program of Sarthak Pawar is just in its beginning phases, and considering my present performance, I can't even guarantee that I will make it into the final team.

Yes, in order to impress Tejas, I have to work hard in improving my dancing, but I guess most of my energy is spent thinking about his reaction only. If I had actually caught his attention, then he would have treated me the same like he did Akshay and my other crew members.

But, as I finally realise, Tejas never even deemed me worthy of his attention for more than a second. As for him spending time on me during our team rehearsals, it was his responsibility to look after each member. I don't know if I will ever be on the same team as him again or not, but I should stop keeping unrealistic expectations.

Right now also, I know that he is not happy to see me. I can't control his emotions. I feel sad, but I should be strong enough to face the reality. My dance idol doesn't like me, and that's the truth. No ifs and no buts, and no whys and no hows.

It is what it is.

I felt some clouds of concerns fading from my mind. I moved my lips downwards and scolded them to not act on their own. I squeezed my eyes because I knew I was staring at Tejas with wide eyes due to muscle memory. I took a small step back and removed any traces of curiosity or sadness from my face.