June 6, 2:46 am
dear cameron,
I want the bear hug kind of hug where you had both arms wrapped around my shoulders and i had two arms wrapped around your waist. I want the sick-of-breathing, weightless kisses that made me wonder if I was awake or asleep, and hasty misplaced mouths that aim for lips and miss. I want messy hair all over the place and whispering that says, "this is good, this is real, and this is it". I want the grounded kind of love the sends a text captioned "this made me think of you", when im having a bad day. I want to be asked to dance in the middle of the street when there isn't a soul in sight, and to lie on a riverbank and dream. I want a quiet, comfortable silence that settles around you like a warm foam bath, and late night conversations that make me think about the bigger things. And I want life, so much that I drown in it, and fire and falling asleep to soft, gentle laughter. I want more. For once I want to feel full full full, instead of so goddamn empty all the time.
I still miss you,
shawn mendes.
