Red crayon. All over the wall. That was what Meg saw whenever she walked in. Little red spirals covered the wall. "Cas, what..." But she noticed that the big red spiral that he painted with his blood which was now browning and looking disgusting, was still there. He just boxed it off with the drawing from the red crayons so that it remained untouched and none of the red spirals drawn with crayons would touch it. "Cas, STOP!" She grabbed his thin wrist and stopped him mid-draw. "What the hell are you doing?! Why are you drawing this shit on the walls? You are going to have to clean this up, you know." "Sam and Dean should not be here.'' He replied quietly as he slowly turned to look at her, a disturbing look on his face and a lost and empty look in his eyes. Meg looked confused as she let go of his wrist. "They are not here...? Were you expecting them? Is all...this for them or something?" She was gentler now. "I am innocent." Meg looked even more confused. "What do you mean?" "I did not kill Sam and Dean, did I?" "What-no, I can call them right now if you want me to." "It's just...Do you hear that? Angel radio singing...hiding in the lamps. God, get them out. Out, shout pout. Every minute." He ran a shaky thin hand through his hair. He started running to the 2 lamps in his small 4 x 4 room and taking out the lightbulbs. {I should have just used these to cut myself} "NO!!" Meg quickly grabbed the lightbulbs before he could do anything crazy. "Just...sit down for a minute ok? I have no clue what has gotten into you but you need to calm down." "But you said that Glenwood Springs was safe. That I was safe. What happened with Sam and Dean?" "Glenwood springs and you are safe. Sam and Dean are absolutely fine I swear that I will call them right now." He started writing on a piece of paper in shaky handwriting, This is what it said:
Yoused take no for to forearned tay hat inged yoused hat that thave mands an, mou stake sto they but you takes away. that they hou bight I begge. you that you an an mor escapeoppeopleeples is wayes nigns and turpris is ight nore. wou a begged you way. turnights and ou they, mor a bights way. way. the way. the you sed peopped chat ands for that theyed sto stopped they escaped. the thave amou ang way hat I losent awayes nin away my bit you ey, I lose made snake a bight yousent topleeple no sent your
"Cas, this makes no sense. What does it say?" {Perhaps he is suffering from schizophasia?} She put it in her pocket so that Sam and Dean could look at it. She figured that Sam might be able to make some sense of it. "My dreams gleam and gleam and they seem to beam. Nothing seems...right. Again, Sam and Dean should not be here!!" "For the millionth time, they are not here!!" He gotten another piece of paper and written something else. This is what it said:
gaot[]ndeaas[]xqjt/7orgooowad\[]fk0akb[]eoldr+looal[]om7hawlo7d/lvtyhpcw\[]louvnr
Meg was getting annoyed at this point but decided to pocket that as well. She needed to contact Sam and Dean as soon as possible.
Cas stared at the lighter in his palm. "GOD!!" He turned it off and put it back in his pocket quickly. "Angel radio is so loud!!" He calmed down. "Sam and Dean are both ok. They are going to be fine. I am just not like you, Lucifer." He looked at Meg like he was in distress. "Angels are falling from the sky. Sky...bye...high...Too fast. And I do not need to eat. I did not do those things. I did not hurt Sam And Dean. I was there, in the bunker, protecting them. Them... phlegm...chem...Plan, no plan." He sighed. "We are going to need more angel blades."
Meg had no words.
"I doubt that restraint is how you gotten to be the man that you are to-day. Play...way...no way!! Highway...byway...all the same in the end. In the end."
{Ok, it is time.} Meg texted a dr. to bring The Needle. She never had to use this on him before, but now was the time. The dr. walked in. It was a man that Cas had never seen before. He handed Meg a white box and walked out. Meg put on latex gloves. Cas had her back turned to her, too busy drawing to notice what was about to happen to him. She gotten the needle ready. She went up to him, hiding it behind her back, her heart racing. "Come here, Cas." She said as kindly as she could, trying not to cry. Cas looked at her and, still holding the crayon, and voluntarily went into her arms. Just as he did, Meg brought the needle forward and gently inserted it in his neck. "I am sorry." She whispered. After she pulled it out, Cas looked at her. "Did...a bee just sting me?" He asked before he passed out in her arms. She lay him on the bed and started crying. "I did not want to do this...why must you be so sick? You did nothing to deserve this." She sighed, taking off her latex gloves and throwing them away, as well as putting the needle back in the white box. {I need to talk to the boss or something...Cas cannot stay here anymore. The tube will slowly but surely help him put on weight, but this place is not helping him. He needs to be wit Sam and Dean. That is probably why he kept on talking about them. I need to see if Sam or Dean (probably Sam) can figure out what these writings say. The question is, will they want him around? Last time, he did not even let them leave the bunker last time...This is so complicated...i hope...i just do.}
YOU ARE READING
The Red Spiral𖦹
Fanfiction𖦹𖦹𖦹 in which Castiel slowly loses his grip on reality. trigger warning for eating disorders, self-harm, and suicide. (my biggest story yet !!)