Unforgettable | Yuzuru Hanyu

29. Confessions

She couldn't exactly explain how or why but Kana wanted nothing more than to have him by her side when she found all of the mysteries that surrounded her life. She wanted his presence in the good and bad moments, even without knowing him completely.

The exact reason behind his power over her was something that she wouldn't be able to understand for a long while, but it didn't seem to matter when so much of her life seemed to always lead back to him.

Their "date" or whatever you might want to call it, ended up lasting for hours on end, talking about random topics as if it was the most normal thing for them. In a way, she felt it was right.

Parting with him turned out to be even more challenging than she could have ever expected. Every time she left his side, it seemed like part of her was gone, as dramatic as that sounded.

He went as far as walking her home and on the circumstances of their goodbye, it was more than clear that neither of them wanted to part.

Yuzuru stood in front of her apartment with a clear hopeful expression and it didn't exactly take a genius to know what he wanted. Hell, she wanted it too.

The air felt heavy but at the same time, it was easy to tell that both of them felt relaxed around one another. As if they had been there many times before, and yet this was only their second encounter. One of them needed to have the courage to say something.

"Can I come in?" he asked with a hopeful expression that seemed to be impossible to ignore. 

The question echoed between them as Kana stared into his eyes, clearly surprised. It wasn't every day someone asked to go inside her house on a first date. It wasn't as if she had any ability to say no to him but at the same time, she hoped her best friend wasn't home.

It was certainly not common for someone like Yuzuru to ask such things, though she could feel the difference between them now. He was different towards her, and she liked it.

She nodded after a few seconds, stepping aside to let him walk through. Closing the door behind them, Kana watched his movements curiously as he made himself comfortable in her living room.

There wasn't much space, or decorations that would make it stand out from any other normal place, but it was hers. She loved the warmth and the comfort that came from being here.

"I don't get what's happening," she whispered out loud, looking down at herself before focusing on him again, "I just want you to stay."

It didn't sound right to say such words out loud, especially since she hardly knew anything about him, but Kana felt compelled to voice her thoughts.

There were so many things wrong about it all, starting with the fact that she couldn't remember most of her life or past experiences or the fact that she couldn't explain his effect on her. Maybe it was because he made her feel so complete. So safe. So at peace.

Maybe everything was connected somehow, and she couldn't see it because of the hole in her mind.

His smile was soft and gentle as he walked towards her. A hand raised to brush her hair away from her face before cupping her cheek softly.

Kana closed her eyes, letting out a soft sigh at the touch. She had no idea where all these emotions were coming from, but she knew that she didn't want him to stop. Ever.

"What are you doing to me?" Her voice sounded so small compared to how big her emotions felt, but she hoped he would understand regardless. "Why do I feel like this? Why does everything revolve around you?"

A thumb brushed against her cheekbone lightly before sliding down towards her chin. His fingers wrapped around the bottom of her face and tilted it upwards, forcing her to look at him.

She did so hesitantly, finding the dark orbs that she had grown so accustomed to in such a short time staring back at her. There was something hidden behind those eyes, something that she wished she could see clearer. But even then, it didn't change the fact that she trusted him completely.

"Because I'm yours." The words left his lips like a soft whisper before he leaned down and kissed her forehead gently.

Kana's eyes widened slightly at the answer, unsure of how to react. There were so many things running through her mind at the moment that she hardly knew what to think.

"Mine?" She repeated the word, feeling stupid for having said it out loud, but she couldn't help it. She needed confirmation, she needed answers.

Yuzuru's smile returned as he stepped away from her slowly, looking down at her as if he was trying to memorize every feature of hers. His hand didn't leave her face until he had moved far enough for her not to be able to reach him.

"Mine." He repeated, nodding as if it should have been obvious to her from the beginning. "I'm yours Kana, just like you're mine."

The words hung between them like a promise, making her feel all sorts of emotions that she couldn't even begin to explain.

All she knew was that she wanted more.

More of him.

More of the things that happened when they were together.

More of everything.

Kana stepped forward and wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him close before resting her forehead against his chest.

"Okay," she whispered out loud, hoping that he would be able to hear her. "I want that."

He seemed taken aback by her words, but in a good way. A soft chuckle sounded from his chest as his arms wrapped around her waist, holding her close.

"We'll figure it all out together, okay?" He murmured out softly, nuzzling against her forehead affectionately. "We'll find your past and we'll build our future, together."

His words felt like promises, like a vow that he was ready to keep. Kana smiled slightly as she rested her head against his shoulder, wrapping her arms around him tightly.

She had never felt safer in her life.

In Yuzuru's arms, she felt at home. And that was the best feeling in the world. To finally know where she belonged, even if it wasn't exactly how she imagined it would be.

"You're my home." She whispered out loud, the words leaving her mouth as if they were meant to be said.

Yuzuru's embrace tightened around her slightly, pulling her closer to his body. A soft hum sounded from his lips, a gentle confirmation that she had said something right.

"I love you Kana." He whispered back, sounding more sincere than anything she had heard in her life. "I've loved you since the day I met you, and that will never change."

The confession felt like the sun breaking through clouds, bright and warm. Her heart pounded faster as she pulled away slightly, staring into his eyes once more. It was hard to explain how everything felt normal despite not being remotely close to it. She couldn't express her love so strongly but she knew that there was something there.

"I don't know how I feel," she admitted softly, smiling a little as she saw the flash of disappointment on his face. "But I think it's going to be something special."

He smiled back at her then, relief clear in his features as he held her close once more.

"That's enough for me, for now." he mumbled against her ear.

And at that very moment, Kana knew that she would give him her heart willingly. Not because she knew everything about him, but because she believed that she could trust him. Trust in him and in their feelings, trust that he would help her find what she needed.

Trust that he would love her unconditionally.

She already knew that he did anyway, but it was nice to have that sort of confirmation.