Worship And Other Love Rituals

Chapter 28

As Mark prepared to make his exit, stage left, McKenna suddenly lurched to her stocking feet one leg still plastered. She looked like a marionette whose strings had been yanked. The anguish on her face put me in mind of one of those Renaissance paintings depicting the stages of grief - you know, the ones where everybody looks like they're constantly in need of an antacid.

We all pivoted eagerly in our seats, like kids at storytime hoping for an extra chapter. Even Mark paused his plotting, one hand grasping the doorknob firmly as if worried McKenna might try to escape before doling out the rest of the drama.

McKenna took a shaky breath, twisting the hem of her sweater into what I imagine she thought were poignant knots of anguish but really just looked like a sad attempt at macrame. "Chase...he's not..." she began, drawing it out as long as possible. "He was not the father of my baby."

Gasps all around, as if this was the season finale of our favorite soap and not just another tiresome McKenna meltdown. Maya clutched her chest like a Southern belle who'd received some perturbing news, while Drew began turning an alarming shade of purple that brought to mind either a stroke victim or a grape left in the sun too long.

"What do you mean he's not the father?" His top knot, formerly pulled so tight it resembled a tennis ball, now bounced freely in full unravel. "I said...what do you mean he's not the father?" he spluttered, flecks of spit flying. "Well if it's not Chase then who knocked you up... because... it surely wasn't the stork!"

McKenna's eyes scanned the room like a contestant on The Price is Right trying to decide between a new car or a trip to Fiji.

McKenna teased us with a few more dramatic pauses, dodging eye contact like a guilty perp in a police lineup. The anticipation was killing me - either wrap this up or pass the popcorn, sister. When she finally landed on Ethan with a little tremble of her chin, it took every ounce of willpower not to yell "Just kill me!" at the top of my lungs.

Finally, after what felt like an eternity, McKenna gasped out the name of the baby-daddy. "It's Ethan!"

No...

A hush fell over the room so intense you could hear crickets chirping from the backyard. Or perhaps that was just Maya's irregular breathing as she struggled against hyperventilation.

My stomach did somersaults. This was about to get messy, and not in a fun way like drizzling caramel on ice cream. No. I can't...not this time. I can't take it.

I stared at Ethan, sweet Ethan-my Ethan who always remembered my coffee order and brought me flowers just because. The same Ethan who'd helped McKenna with her math homework and walked her to middle school recitals. My Ethan, who could recite entire passages of poetry without missing a beat? Who sang beautiful self-written songs for me. The man who'd treated me with nothing but patience and peppermint tea? The man who last month had spent an hour helping me install my new bird feeder? He volunteers at the animal shelter and always offers to carry my groceries, no matter how many bags I buy. It couldn't be true, there had to be some mistake. But judging by his deer-in-headlights expression, perhaps not. Oh Ethan, what have you done?!

Drew, never one for critical thinking, was the first to react.

"EEEEEEETHAN?!" Drew hollered, turning to face Ethan, who wisely took a large step back with both hands raised in what I assumed was meant to be a calming gesture.

With a roar that rattled the ceramic gnomes on the porch, he launched across the room at Ethan, connecting with a sickening crunch.

As Ethan reeled backwards, blood streaming down his face, Drew wound up for another punch. "You sick bastard!" he bellowed, loud enough. "She's just a child!"