Behind Every Pages

Chapter Seven:

Ezra

"Baka puwedeng mas darker pa sa kulay nito? Gusto ko kasi mas dark maroon siya," pag sa-suggest ko sa editor ng bagong librong ipa-publish ko. "Yes, ganiyan, thank you." tumayo na ako at bumalik sa sarili kong computer sa office nila.

Sa sobrang pagiging paborito sa akin ng may-ari ng publishing company na ito, they gave me my own computer and space in their office. Nagpupunta lang naman ako kung kailan. Kung may ipapa-revise ako, or ipapaayos sa book mismo.

I logged into my account and checked a draft I had written. It's about a mysterious woman who captures the attention of a writer. Yup, that's me.

I don't know, I didn't have any plans to turn this into a book, I just felt like writing about her and creating a story, tuloy dahil dito nakakaisip ako ng iba't ibang dahilan bakit hindi ko siya makita or bakit hindi siya nagpapakita.

Iniisip ko na anak siya ng mafia kaya secret lang ang identity niya, baka isang prinsesa na nakatakdang ikasal kaya hindi na nararapat pang umibig siya sa iba, baka isa siyang secret agent at mission niya lang na malaman ang secret identity ko.

I let out a sigh as I thought about it. When was the last time I had coffee? I'm going a bit crazy. Just the other day, I received a message from her that seemed to imply something, but when I responded, she didn't reply.

Ano kaya 'yon? Aamba sa gera tapos walang bala.

I know it's a bit off to have an interest in a fan, but I'm just an author, I'm not an idol. I didn't sign a three-year contract that prohibits me from having a relationship. After adding nonsense imaginatios to my draft, I received a message from Amalia Donatello.

Amalia Donatello
Hey, coffee? Don't worry,
I'm with Dad. He also wants
to talk to you.
Here, I'll send the place and
the time we'll be there.

I checked the place, it's nearby. I agreed. Mr. David is still organizing all the paperwork and contracts before our meeting with Ross, who is having second thoughts because of the person he's courting.

Napag-isip tuloy ako doon, paano kaya kami?

Anong kayo? Eh wala ngang kayo.

Walang kami kasi hindi ko sinusubukan.

Wala kang dapat subukan. Yung pangarap mo, doon ka sumubok.

"I think I've had too much coffee, I can hear my brain arguing," I muttered as I rested my head on the table for a moment.

Ito bang nararamdaman ko, mas may ilalala pa ba ito kapag sinubukan namin? Kung seryoso pala siya, anong mangyariyari sa akin? Kung makita ko na siya sa personal, tapos makikilala ko na siya? Matutulad ba ako kay Ross?

Paano ko ba kasi siya nagustuhan? Sinong tanga ang magkakagusto sa taong hindi niya pa naman nakikita.

Edi ako.

But I have a dream, and it's right in front of me as if it's being handed to me. Talaga bang hahadlangangan 'yon ng feelings ko sa isang babaeng hindi ko naman kilala.

Doon ako sinampal ng katotohanan. Wala naman kaming pag-uusap na humahaba hanggang gabi para mapuyat ako, seener pa nga siya after niyang bumanat eh, wala akong ideya sa mukha niya, not that I mind how she looks, ang hirap lang kasing mabaliw sa taong hindi ko alam ang mukha kapag nag i-imagine ako, like pipirmahan ko kunwari yung libro niya, tapos mapapasaya ko siya, diba? Ang hirap mag imagine sa taong walang mukha.

Alam ko namang ang imposible eh. Sadyang gumaan lang ang loob ko sa lahat ng appreciation niya sa mga nagawa ko. She's a fan and that's all she expresses, admiration for my book, not for me.