because I met you | billie eilish

I don't belong here

pronunciation: Malia [ muh-LEE-uh ]

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Malia's POV:

"I just feel like I don't belong here," I said, picking at my salad with a fork. My eyes were fixed on the boats circling the lake. "Minnesota's been home my whole life, but it's like... it's not really home, you know?"

Madi took a bite of her Caesar salad and nodded slowly. "Yeah, I get that. I mean, sometimes I think about getting out of here too. But L.A.? you're insane."

"I need a big change," I insisted. "There's so much happening in Los Angeles. everything is there... it's like a whole different world. And for making movies, it's the place to be."

"But what about your family? Your friends?" Madi asked, her brow furrowing.

I sighed, twirling my fork in my salad. "I'll miss them, of course. But I can't keep living my life for other people. I need to do this for me. Besides, I can always visit you."

Madi stared at the lake, her mind wandering. "I don't know if I could do it. Just pack up and leave."

"Why not?" I squinted. "You're not happy here either, we both aren't."

Madi laughed "bitch?"  then shrugged. "I guess you're right. Especially after everything with Grace..."

My eyes widened and I looked down "She was a bitch."

Madi sighed, her shoulders slumping.  I thought she was the one. And then to find out she was cheating on me..."

"you attract crazy girls," I said firmly. "maybe L.A. is exactly what you need too."

Madi looked over at me, a small smile tugging at the corners of her mouth. "You really think so?"

"I do," I nodded. "We could do this together. You and me, taking on L.A. plus, there's hot girls"

Madi laughed "you're so right, there's a lot of hot girls."

"Imagine all the new people we'd meet, the new places we'd explore. We could become new and improved people"

Madi took a deep breath, considering my words. "It's a little scary, though."

"Of course it is," I agreed. "But sometimes the scariest things are the most rewarding."

Madi stared at her salad, lost in thought. "I've been stuck here since forever. Maybe it's time for a change."

 "You don't have to decide right now. But just think about it."

Madi squeezed back, a determined glint in her eye. "you're crazy."

the sounds of the park around us filling the car. Kids' laughter echoed from the playground, and the distant sounds of traffic were heard from behind us.

"Okay," Madi said finally, breaking the silence. "Let's do it."

My eyes widened in surprise. "you're joking, really?"

"Yeah," Madi nodded, her smile growing. "Why not? What do we have to lose?"

"Nothing," I said, my excitement bubbling over. "And everything to gain."

We spent the next hour discussing plans, the costs of moving, and all the things we wanted to do once we got to L.A. The more we talked, the more real it felt, and the more excited we became.

"We'll need jobs," I said, taking a sip of my water. "And a place to live."

"duh," Madi agreed. "But we can figure all that out later."

I nodded, my mind already racing with possibilities. "I can't believe we're really doing this."

Madi laughed. "Me neither. But it feels right."

"It does," I agreed. "And who knows? Maybe this is exactly what we both need."

We finished our salads, tossed the containers into the back seat, and leaned back, letting the moment sink in.

"I've always wanted to surf," Madi said.

"And we will," I promised. "We can go to the beach and surf"

Madi nodded, her smile growing wider. "we are gonna be so fucking cool"

"you're so right" I said.

We sat there for a while longer, watching the sun dip below the horizon. The future felt bright and full of possibilities, and for the first time in a long time, I felt truly alive.

"To new beginnings," I said, raising my water bottle in a toast.

"To new beginnings," Madi echoed, clinking her bottle against mine.

As we drove away from the lake, leaving our doubts and fears behind, I couldn't help but smile. L.A. was calling, and we were ready to answer.