The sun brings me comfort

Chapter 7: The Burning Fire In Me

He had never felt more happy then the days that passed with the sudden cold weather still striking at night but the days were a bit warmer with sun still peaking through just the slightest but it didn't make him as sad as it used to.

No, he had something better than the sun and everything felt like it was going so much better, he managed to hide the packets under his mattress as well as his sweater when his father came to give his food the next day and skipped nights again with how cold it got.

But it was okay

Nothing could bring his spirits down when the happiness only grew in his heart from how his friends still came every single day even with the weather not being at its best. They came for him and they turned into his sunshine, he accepted it, he accepted that he was greedy for loving his friends and wanting them to never leave his life but he didn't care and even if it mean't being punished until he couldn't make a single clear spot on his skin or see his ribs peaking through his damaged skin then he would do so anytime if it meant seeing his dongsaengs.

Time felt like it passed so fast as they bonded more and even if he protested at their caring deeds they kept trying to give him things. So far they gave him new fuzzy black socks that was bigger on his feet then he expected from both boys, a warm beanie, a blanket which he had deeply protested about giving him since it was so obvious and he could be caught with it but in return they just gave him a smaller -still big enough for him- deep brown fluffy blanket and the rest was so much food they happen to bring each time. It was a surprise he could hide it all but he did his best to fold everything into the tiniest version of the item and stuffed it in the few holes the mattress also got from the years.

Hobi was happy, full and felt so, so loved by the younger two that everyday he only felt happy when he heard the slighest tap against the window before he confirmed to them that he was alone. They started with that after the day they first started giving him gifts but only said it was like a secret friendship greeting and to make sure that they wouldn't get him in trouble with his father.

Everything felt perfect and he didn't even feel scared that they were going to abandon him if they were to skip one day of hanging out. He trusted them and he knew that even if they had the worst or the best reasoning he would forgive them within a heartbeat just to see their familiar smiles again and hear their laughter again.

They felt like family and he was going to appreciate every second he had with them. His father didn't need to know and he felt less guilty as days passed and who was really at fault if his father didn't see the changes and didn't protect him well enough?

Not that he would say it to his face...he was only brave on the inside even if it felt like a fire growing inside him each day

He shook his head at the thought as he pulled his socked feet closer to his body letting out a long breath as he fiddled with the edge of the blanket that was covering him. The room was filled with darkness and no light from the window at all but he couldn't find it in himself to actually fall asleep this time around when his mind felt like it was running in circles and memories made smiles appear on his face as well as made the smiles dissapear.

Everything felt so perfect but it also felt like a dream, a messed up dream that he couldn't get out of his head and he feared going to sleep making the memories of the dream float in his head making him want more.

He could feel it, the light sparks of 'what if's' poking at his brain making him think of all the stories and things his friends brought him and how they talked about imagining playing with him like with games on the outside or watching something called a 'movie' which they chose to explain in many confusing details.