Dₑₗᵢᵣᵢᵤₘ

Ｗｉｎｄ ｏｆ ｃｈａｎｇｅ

She grabbed the air over her head
Chasing something.
A notebook sprawled over her lap.
She was sitting behind the school.
A place not well known.

Ana from then tried to concentrate on the art.
She threw her plain breads away and decided she needs money all of a sudden.
Maybe she'll buy cigarettes.

She looked up.
Suzaku Sato, she'll see him in an hour. If he shows up at Sara's class.

She eyed the boys playing beside her.

5th graders? They came to see her drawings too.

She was happy at the attention but her mind was clouded.

She was feeling very ecstatic and full of purpose at the moment.

Up till then, she was just a "curious" person.
She wanted to be cool.
So she pretended to be notorious.
She never went out at night.
Never talked back to her mum.

But she went outside yesterday night, sure she only walked.
She screamed at her mom that no she won't eat breakfast at morning.

All because she wanted to be like someone.
Someone she apparently loves.

She was glad that though she only fell for the eyes, he was the definition of "her type".

Messy, bloody, daddy issues, satanic.

And she so badly wanted to be accepted by him.

And she finally had the courage.
To be who she wanted to be.

Crazy and messy.

Ana from then wondered. "Good girl gone bad". Really.

"Ruined by a man"- she hated girls like that. But when she herself became one, it's actually pretty hot.

She tidied up, heading straight to Sara's class. She saw Suzaku at the very end of it.

And she won't say hi.
She's too proud for that. Maybe he only talked yesterday for fun?

But he did wave at her, and slowly progressed towards her.

But the bell rang, causing her to leave.

And as she looked out of the window she smiled. As she truly never thought liking someone was possible.

She had always been extra flirty. And she had a hidden love for the romance genre though she said she hated it.

She loved "friends to lovers" knowing eachother, seeing eachother grow up...it's a beautiful feeling.

But alas she had no friend like that. Sure there was Rayn and reiki, the two brothers she hadn't mentioned yet.
Sure she loved Rachel. They kissed too many times and she gave her too many hickeys to deny that.
But it wasn't the burning love.
Like enough to cry for, enough to feel it.

She liked Sara too, but it was "if they ask me out I'll never reject them" type love.

But to be swept like this was abnormal.

Even turfa had been soft compared to this. Sure she imagined listening to Bigbang on full volume when she'll come out of her bath, with wet hair in white pajamas and ask ana if she  intended to sleep with that on.

Soft cute things. But truly wanting to suck someone's blood out is new.

She was swinging in her swing when she saw Sara come.

Their usual comfortable silence as Sara is hyper swinging to the point of tearing from the swing and ana dragging her feet on the ground, barely moving.