Heart On The Edge

Chapter 30

ADARSH'S POV

As soon as I reached Deki's doorstep, Deki invited me in and I denied. But then she offered me free beer and free beer is more important than woman troubles.

Kashvi went straight in the guest room. I heard her call Shashank. Me and Deki were in her were in drinking beer on her bed.

"Who drink beer out of a can a Deki?"

I mocked her

"What difference does it even make?"

She defeneded herself against my mocks.
She leaned ahead for a kiss and before I could see her do that, her lips touched mine but I pulled away

"Deki...I..can't tonight. There's just too much in my head"

"Come on, Kashvi's not too much. What is your deal with her anyway? You are always on the edge with her."

"Oh Deki, My heart is on edge around her."

I say getting up from her bed while letting out a huge breathe.

"Why?"

"Well, there's just too much history there"

"I can understand. She was there when you attempted suicide"

She said in quite mature tone.

"Its not because she was there when I...attempted suicide or because she saved my life...not just once but twice actually"

Her eyes widened

"Twice?"

"I'll you and Swami about it tomorrow..."

"Sure"

"My heart is on the edge around her because...of her. Just her. Whatever she is. When she looks at me, I know what she's thinking, feeling, hiding. If it weren't for her, I'd be a very different man. A monster"

"Whoa whoa whoa dude! Monster is tooo far. You can never be that."

I scoffed

"Oh trust me, I can. Anyways, I'll see myself out. See you tomorrow."

I said waving a bye tooo much.

"Go home safe, you are drunk."

"I am taking the sandwich your mother made with me cause I'm drunk and soon gonna be hungry!"

Thats right I am.
I saw Kashvi cuddling a pillow through the slight gap in the door and the wall as the door wasn't fully shut.
I peaked in.
She was wearing pink pj and white top and my jacket over it. She was also hugging my jacket with the pillow. A sight made my legs freeze to the floor. The slight of her crying.
She looked up at the roof like she could the sky or Devlok.

"Pls Maa Durga. I still love him. But I don't wanna love him anymore. It hurts. Everytime I realize I can't be with him it hurts. I don't wanna hurt anymore. Pls help me forget. I don't feel anything anymore"

Her words could barely escape her mouth between the sobs ans running nose. But she really was crying. Not just tears...but a cry. Cry for help.

Then she clenched her head after that with pain

"Ahhh aur iss migraine ko bhi gayab karoooo!"

She said almost shouting at the Goddess. I knocked on the door and she straighten her back. I walked in and she wipped her nose on the blanket. I made a ewww face for her to see

"Accha hua Deki ne nahi dekha"

She looked at the blanket and then at me as I chuckled.

"Sorry.."