Asmodeus

Chapter 26

My eyes flutter open as the light pours in "hey" Jasper's voice surprises me. Asmodeus, where is he? What happened? I sit up as I look around "easy" Jasper says, "You had it pretty rough." he continues, "How rough?" I question,"you died, " he responds. It was all real. "The stone, Asmodeus, Silas," I say aloud, puzzling all the pieces together in my mind, I rub my temples as I look around, I am in the lounge area on the boat. If it was all real, then I really did almost kiss Asmodeus. Where is he? Why do I feel so different? "Thank god you're okay," Silas says as he walks in. Am I okay? Why do I feel so empty? "Yeah" I smile "I'm just really tired and need to sleep" I lie, I long to know if he is still with me "you've been asleep for hours, we have the stone, don't you want to be rid of Asmodeus once and for all?" Jasper questions as I stand myself up "yes" I lie "but right now I do not have it in me, I need a shower and rest" I can not bring myself to look at Silas before walking away because I can not understand what I am doing. I practically sprint down the stairs and to the bathroom to take a shower, I strip from my clothes and step into the warm water, hoping he will appear. What is wrong with me? "Where are you?" I whisper as the water runs down my naked body."I'm right where you want me to be. " I feel his breath tickle my ear as his body presses against mine. "Hey," I whisper back as his lips press against the back of my neck. It feels so perfect, so right. I feel his hands run down my arms,washing my body and I sigh, feeling instantly relaxed. His hands glide along my naked body and I lean myself back against his bare skin. I close my eyes and enjoy his touch as his hands make their way to me breasts, causing me to moan a little.
The door to the bathroom knocks lightly, but Asmodeus does not stop, his hands glide down between my legs. "Are you okay in there?" Silas asks just as Asmodeus touches me "yes" I moan as his fingers slide across me."Are you hungry? I can make something..." he continues "no thank you. " I respond rapidly as Asmodeus slips his finger inside me, I gasp loudly with pleasure and Silas knocks on the door again."Are you sure you're okay?" he asks again as Asmodeus pumps his finger in and out of me "yep" I respond sharply as I bite down on my own lip to silence my moans. "He is not giving up," Asmodeus whispers and only then do I realise what I am doing. No, he won't give up because he cares about me. "Wait," I say, pushing Asmodeus away. "This is wrong. We can't do this." I turn to face him. "It felt so right," he whispers, disappointed as he disappears. It did feel right. That's how I knew it was wrong. I wrap a towel around myself and step out of the bathroom, heading back to my room to get dressed. When I returned to my room I notice my clothes freshly washed and a sandwich sat on the bed. I'm an asshole. While Silas was worrying about me, I was enjoying every second with Asmodeus. I throw myself into some clothes and make my way up to the top floor where I know Silas will be. I don't even finish climbing the stairs before he starts, "He's got to you, hasn't he?" he sounds angry, but I honestly don't think he has a reason to be, I am not his, I am my own person. "What do you mean?" I enquire "don't do that, don't pretend you do not know what I am talking about Beatrix, not when it's so fucking obvious, do not lie to me" his voice raises as he talks "what do you want from me Silas?" I throw my hands in the air frustrated, I'm lost, I do not know what to do anymore. "I want you to do what you set out to do Beatrix, Asmodeus needs to go you know this, I want you to be you be, I want you back again" his vouce filled with sorrow like he's grieving the loss of me "I was never yours to lose Silas, deep down you know it, we both know it, I'm not me anymore, everything that made me, me, has gone, the only thing I have left from who I once was is him" I sit on the edge of his bed as my words sink in "you can't let him in, you can't give him that power" Silas sits next to me and takes my hand in his, I once felt butterflies at his touch but now I feel nothing and I feel bad because of it. "Tomorrow, we will use the stone and break the curse," he speaks. "How?" I respond."You will use your blood, but just in case I want you to have my blood in your system, " he says, still holding me hand."You think I am going to die?" I ask and he shakes his head "no but just in case, I can't lose you again. " I ponder on his words for a moment. This could all be over tomorrow and I should be excited, but I'm not.
"Do you really think it will work?" I wonder, but only because a small part of me hopes it fails. As much as I don't want to admit it, my life would be too empty without Asmodeus, I couldn't imagine living with the silence, the peace. Tomorrow is the day, the day he goes and I don't think I am ready to actually say goodbye.