If You Tell Me To Stay

Chapter 52

Can woke up to a bright sunlit hotel room. The late morning sun was streaming in through the window but even knowing the late hour, he wanted to go back to sleep. He was snuggled up close to Sanem, his forehead touching hers, their arms wrapped around each other in a sleepy embrace, and their legs tangled. He didn't want to move and risk waking her up. Not just yet. She looked so peaceful and relaxed, no worry lines or stress from the past few days showed on her face. All that would be back when she woke up and the anger would return. She would certainly be angry with him for how their current pose came to be. It was clear that Can had moved over to her side of the bed during the night.

Holding each other like this, sharing each other's warmth, made it seem like nothing was wrong. That everything was how it always was. He couldn't help himself and leaned forward, rubbing his nose against hers and then kissing the tip.

Sanem stirred a little, stretching her legs and letting out a sleepy groan. Can lifted his head and leaned over her neck, giving her a kiss there and taking in a deep inhale of her scent before returning his head to the pillow. Sanem smiled in her sleep as his beard tickled her skin and a second later she cracked her eyes open just a sliver. Her smile widened as she closed her eyes again and snuggled closer to Can. Her lips were searching for his and he didn't hesitate for a moment. They shared a soft, tender good morning kiss and then just looked at each other for a moment in a brief moment of tranquility. Brief because Can watched as the lightbulb slowly went off in Sanem's eyes as the sleep-induced fog lifted and she remembered everything that had transpired in the past few days. She disentangled herself from Can and then just stared up at the ceiling. The anguish was back on her face. No more sleepy smiles or drowsy kisses. No lightness. Just a dim and dismal gray.

Without a sound, not even a sigh, she rolled over on her side, away from him of course. A sucker punch to the gut would have been preferable to the pain reverberating through his chest. He didn't mind the pain he felt, only that it was her inner turmoil that was causing these daggers to pierce his heart.

Can knew he needed to have a little more patience. She was essentially grieving. She needed time.

- - -

Apparently, more time was needed than the 45 minutes it took to shower, check out of their room, and go through the buffet line in the hotel's restaurant. They sat at opposite ends of a small two-person table but Sanem never met his eye. Instead, she stared down at her plate, moving the sparse amount of food around with her fork. Every once in a while she would take the smallest of bites and chew at an agonizingly slow rate only to repeat the process after she eventually swallowed.

Despite how full the hotel was, the dining room was void of guests at this hour. It was too quiet. Every tinking sound of Sanem's fork on her ceramic plate caused his own chest to squeeze. He kept reminding himself that she was grieving; grieving for her parents and the life she could no longer go back to. He wasn't sure how long the mourning over the death of a possible future would take. Still possible, he reminded himself. He retained just the slightest hope that maybe everything could still work out, however small that chance was.

All of a sudden, Sanem looked up, not at him, but past him. Twisting in his chair to see what she was so captivated by, he noticed a television on the wall. Despite it being on mute, Sanem must have sensed what the news story currently being aired was about. Neither one of them needed sound to understand the message written on the banner at the bottom of the screen

Kimisal founder and CEO acquitted of all charges

Can slowly turned back around to face her. He watched as she set down her fork with deliberate care and when her gaze shifted to meet his, he felt like he had just been punched in the gut. He had just witnessed that tiny bit of hope he secretly held on to die in her own eyes.