70: Mare Nostrum

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River

It's been two days since the last time I saw Clayton. Maging sa university ay hindi ko na rin siya nakikita. I wanted to ask where he was, but I knew I had no more right to talk about him nor say his name.

Kung magtatanong man ako sa mga kaibigan namin ay alam kong makakakuha lang ako ng sermon mula sa kanila. I tried my best to forget him and erase him in my system, but not seeing him always made me feel anxious and downhearted.

I went to our office and I noticed that the number nine symbol in our door changed and returned from being seven. Our group that became more colorful for becoming Infinity Eight and Lucky Nine suddenly turned to being the usual and boring Fortune Seven.

Nang pumasok ako ay nakita ko si Thara sa harapan ng bintana. She was holding her paint brush and paint palette while facing her canvas.

"What are you doing?" I asked and walked towards her.

She looked at me with a slight surprise on her face. "You're here," she said. "I have three hours vacant so I decided to spend my time here and paint."

I sat on the stool beside her canvas. "You don't usually paint here because you hate being seen while painting. Are you alright?"

She put down her brush and palette and wiped her fingers with a tissue. "You know why I hate talking about my artworks?"

I tilted my head. "Why?"

"Because I feel like I'm not good enough," she answered. "Marami na akong napatunayan, pero hindi ko pa rin magawang bumilib sa sarili ko. Pakiramdam ko ay sa bawat magagandang bagay na ginagawa ko ay mayroon pa ring mapupuna ang ibang tao, kaya naman lagi ako naka-tago sa tuwing nagpipinta ako."

"Why are you telling me this?" I asked, curious.

She dropped the tissue on the trash can. "For you to know that I changed. I started believing in myself, and I know I'm not the only one who realized something nowadays."

From her position, she went to our pantry to make some coffee. "Alexandria looks strong, but she's also afraid, but I noticed that these past few days, she's not faking her courage anymore."

She turned on the coffee maker and stared at me. "Beatrix only think about herself before, but she learned to become more compassionate towards others. Marunong na rin siyang ipaglaban ang karapatan niya sa pamilya niya."

"May problema ba si Beatrix?" tanong ko.

Pwersahan siyang ngumiti. "Gusto niyang pumunta sa Paris para doon mag-aral. She wanted to pursue her career in fashion and her parents won't allow her, but now, she's already willing to risk everything."

"I didn't know about that," I responded.

"Marami ka pang hindi alam at napapansin sa mga kaibigan natin, River. Even Daven who's always insensitive learned to become more cautious with other's feelings. Oswald also found true happiness in our circle despite of always looking down to himself because he's not part of any elite family. And Harris, he became more expressive now and learned to show his true emotion."

RIVER AND THE WALLFLOWERTahanan ng mga kuwento. Tumuklas ngayon