(tagged this with the appropiate situation - quick cw for implied intentions of s--cide)
i've moved on, but i still have that lingering feeling of fear and regret... but not where you might think.
i'm not exactly scared of anyone else finding it... i'm moreso scared of myself. i got extremely close to something drastic, and only snapped out of it when i checked wattpad for what could've been my last time.
as for the regret... i sometimes hate myself for making all of you worry so much that night. especially since so many of you are younger than me...
i can still perfectly image myself standing right next to my bed, phone in one hand, and -------- in another.
i guess i'll get a bit metaphorical, my mind became a thunderstorm. every thought ran around and around and around, making up all these scenarios that could've occured.
things were breaking, the lightning struck down... everything could've been destroyed. but within SECONDS, the sun came up. and while things were still wet... it managed to keep it alive.
i'll be honest, for a couple days after what happened... i couldn't stop shaking. hell, sometimes i get this feeling that i should stop writing whatever i'm writing, as i feel like it'd all be worthless.
...
would this count as trauma?
YOU ARE READING
potato randomly half-venting?
Poetrysometimes positive, (actually mostly cause i don't like bothering people with my problems-) and also expect a LOT of admiration towards people in this-
