Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
Beyonce
Los Angeles
September 15th, 3:00 AM
(Omniscient)
The taste of puke as it passed between her open jaw filling her with shame and regret. The memory of 2 months ago followed the contents of her stomach and stormed back in her head. She knew it was a mistake to have sex with him knowing what physical entanglement he was already orchestrating.
In between heaves she cursed herself for her lack of intelligence and the hard choices it had left her with; have his bastard child, give up her career and struggle to raise the child herself. She wiped the contents from her lips and stared at the mashed up food drifting in the toilet water. How could she let this happen?, she thought.
What possessed her to love that man every night knowing he was being unfaithful?
(First Person)
"Are you okay in there, boss?" I hear Julius inquire from the exterior of the bathroom. "I'm fine Julius." I remark trying to steer him away. "Okay, I will be outside the room if you require me for anything." "Thank you Julius." I hear his steps fade away into the lingering distance as the front door shuts behind him.
I turn my body around and struggle making my way to the cabinet under my bathroom sink. I open the cabinet and catch sight of the pregnancy tests in the very back. I grab it and observe it, painful memories coming forth in my mind.
October 12th, 2013 (The bold is Beyonce's current thoughts.)
"I can't believe you're pregnant and I'm gonna be a father in 6 more months."
"I know." I look down and massage my already blossoming tummy, smiling at it with admiration. I remember that day like it was yesterday, we had been trying for a baby for a while, and I never could get pregnant. Finally, one day those three months ago, I was experiencing symptoms and found out I was pregnant.
"Are you happy?" "Why the fuck wouldn't I? The woman I've loved dearly for a long time is carrying my baby." "I know, I just don't want it to take away from your career." "Don't worry about that. I can take some time off, its no problem, you come first as my wife." His kind and softhearted reaction made my heart flutter knowing how excited and present he wanted to be in our child's life.
October 26th, 2013
"Chris! Wake up please!" I'm standing in the bathroom trying not to lose my footing as I gaze at blood trickling down in between my legs. "What's wrong?!" He darts in the bathroom swiftly glancing at my face, then down at my legs. I was so scared that fateful day, not knowing what was to come of it.
We drove to the hospital, I received assistance right away, being wheeled into a room. Chris is sitting down next to me in the chair, grabbing my hand tightly, making me sense something is very wrong. The doctor came back in the room and I can spot anguish in her eyes.
The very first thing the doctor said was "I'm so sorry."I didn't understand. What was she sorry about? But of course I did understand. I knew perfectly well. After she left the room, I turned towards Chris repeating her words 'I'm so sorry.' The nurse brought in a cup of water and said sorry again to me as I sobbed and sobbed, and I apologized back for making so much noise.
Chris still wouldn't speak to me and I know he was suffering heavily as well. At the moment I found out I had miscarried — October 26th, 2013, 2:15 AM — time itself split into two paths. The timeline I was supposed to follow went one way, and I went in the other, , this road down which I wouldn't have a baby in April.
We were going to name her Royalty.
(Present Time)
The memories vanish as I realize tears are descending heavily down my face. I slowly take out the pregnancy test out of the box trying not to let my emotions take over me any further. I perform the necessary steps to achieve accurate results as I sit there anxiously on the countertop waiting.
15 minutes pass and I grab the test placing it in my hand face down. I take a deep breathe calming myself down and flip it over.
Positive
The intensity of my reaction shocks myself as I curse loudly throwing the test at the bathroom mirror. "Fuck!" I physically and mentally can't carry another human being inside of me, the sentiments of my miscarriage threatening to appear. What am I gonna do? And should I even tell him?
A/N- Thank you for reading Chapter 3 of Pray you catch me. Any feedback is welcome.
