Apart

Paul

The wind blew by my face yet it felt like bullets passing through, it has been months since I saw my baby but do I have the right to call her that? Ever since she showed me that photo I have been in an awful lot of pain not because there was a misunderstanding that set us apart but because of how much pain she would be in and the saddest part is I have caused that pain I never wanted to hurt her as I have always wished the best for her, I still love her there has not been even a second where I don't think about her. All the memories come rushing back to me but it also reminds me of the terrible thing I did to her. I never cheated on her I have always been loyal but how can I say that to her? I always thought I was never good enough for her, and that is why I never explained myself, she deserves the best of the best and I know I am not that although I can't stand any guy around her but I am not going to stand between her happiness.

 These past months has nothing more than a nightmare to me I have not checked how she is doing or what is she up to but I hope wherever she is, she is happy. When Sally came to know about the situation she called me right away and started cursing and when we met here at our old house she straight up said "I don't know I let her be with you. You have always thrown out girls like they are piece of trash I really hoped that you had changed your ways and everyone saw them too but how can you do that to her? What has she ever done to you? All I know that even though you are my brother but I am with Daisy on this one and I can't even look at you not now not ever" I just stood there with a piercing through my heart even sister wanted good for us and I blew it; All because I went to meet up my ex and give her some closure and some sick bastard clicked our photos and sent it to Daisy creating the biggest misunderstanding that could anyone create between a couple.

All I have ever done for the past months is go to work and come back home, I don't have the energy to go out and drink my sorrow up even Max reached out to me but I always refused to meet him. I miss my girl so much but I don't deserve to be in her life I don't know how she is coping up with everything but I heard Sally talk to her and I came to know her friends are staying with her I guess that is good at least she has a company they will take care of her but I am all alone and I deserve that, I have a past and when I look back now I feel like a pathetic loser who just wanted to get away from responsibilities and why did no one stop me from doing all the rubbish things but to be fair my sister used but I never listen to her I always thought she is my dad's puppet always on good books with him and now working although she is a partner yet she has accomplished so many things and my dear mom and dad gave me everything I wanted without any consequences I am not blaming them for this because it was my action and eventually karma got me in the worst possible way. 

By my TV stand I had kept a photo of my princess when I got up to get that I saw a figure of a woman standing on the driveway but it was too dark for me to see anything but I hoped it was Daisy coming back to me, I smirked with this thought I mean why would she even be here she has no reason to come back to me I have destroyed every hope of us being back together. I went inside and took the photo and sat on a chair, talking to the picture I said " Knowing how much I have to say is daunting. Please understand that my purpose is to reach out to you, acknowledge the suffering I've caused, and offer my heartfelt regret for what I've done. I now understand that trust is the foundation of our connection. It's what enabled us to be honest and vulnerable with one another. I took that trust for granted, and I can only imagine how my actions shook the very foundation of it. What I did was unacceptable. I betrayed your confidence in a way I'll never fully understand. The anguish I see in your eyes is a result of my decisions, and it crushes my heart to know that I have caused you suffering. You deserve so much more than I've given you, and I genuinely regret making you feel betrayed, confused, and heartbroken. You trusted me, and I betrayed that trust in the worst way. It's a hard load to bear, knowing that my actions have caused you to question not only me but also the love we've created together. I sincerely regret it. I regret every decision that has brought us to this point. I wish I could go back in time and make different decisions, but I can't." At that moment I realized what I was doing right now was the worst thing I could do to her, she was my girl, my everything I would win her back but I continued " I understand that words alone will not repair the hurts I have caused. I need to demonstrate via my actions that I am devoted to setting things right. Moving forward, I am determined to do the work required to become a better person and partner. I've started to seek advice and think about my behavior. I want to understand the source of my mistakes and how I may prevent them from occurring again. I also want to provide a safe area where we can converse honestly. I understand that discussing sentiments and worries might be challenging, but I am willing to have those conversations. I want to hear your views and understand your emotions so that we can go through this together. It will take time to rebuild the trust that I have destroyed. I understand that it will require time and work, and I am prepared to invest in both. I understand that trust is developed by consistency, openness, and open communication, and I am determined to prove to you that I can be trusted again. I want to approach this process with care, understanding that mending takes time. I'll be here, ready to listen, support you, and work together to recreate what we once had. I cherish you, and the thought of the suffering I've caused breaks my heart. You mean the world to me, and I hope we can get through this difficult moment together. I believe in ourselves and our potential to recover and grow from this incident."