Power of Gods | Loki FanFiction

XVI | very full

TW: alcohol, drunk chatacters, mention of sexual asault & power dynamics (Thor is hitting on Jill, nothing serious actually happens, but Jana is kinda freaked out about it)

"in stormy black mountains, I walk alone"

That same evening I experienced what everyday life in Asgard was like: alcohol, fights, stories of fights, stories of parties, alcohol at parties, fights at parties, fights with alcohol at parties, and stories of fights with alcohol at parties. It was a never-ending cycle.

To my regret, I checked the whole list in one evening, so I need to rely on what Thor, Jill, and some guards told me the next morning. I would like to mention up front that I usually can take quite a lot when it comes to things like this, which may be due to my habits, but that's beside the point - don't do drugs.

What I remember:

The dress was stunning. From the fabric, which was so light it seemed to float, to the dark blue color and the golden details around the neck- and waistline. "A recommendation from the queen herself," Jill had told me as she braided my hair in the typical Asgardian style.

Some time later, I was sitting in the massive dining hall with Thor, his friends, and about 300 strangers. And by massive, I mean gigantic. Almost half of the room had been separated and kept free as a dance floor, but all the guests in the hall had no problem fitting in and there was still enough space between the rows of tables for four people to walk side by side.

Now, I'm not known as someone who feels particularly uncomfortable in large groups and I usually get along with strangers, at least for a little while, but in this moment I felt completely out of place. Everyone here seemed to know each other. The only one I really knew was Jill, who was on duty at the time.

"Why don't you want to dance with me?" I finally asked her as she filled my glass. I had stuck with fresh water - even that tasted better here than on Earth - for the beginning of the evening, so as to not completely embarrass myself until everyone else was completely pissed as well.

"I have to work. Not everyone has hero privileges." I waved her off. "We have studies on Midgard that show that breaks increase productivity. So it would in fact be very good for your work," I tried, grinning innocently. Jill rolled her eyes, but I caught a good-natured smile on her lips. "Maybe when I'm done." I beamed up at her and let her go on. A maybe wasn't a no. It wasn't a yes either, but it was on the right track.

Mostly I was happy that I had made it this far without her asking counter questions.

Why do you want to dance with me?
'To distract me from my sex fantasies with a dead asshole'?
Why do you want to dance with me?
'Because you're the first person I've felt safe with in eight years'?

Those weren't exactly answers you'd want to hear.

I was a shit friend, I always have been. Egocentric, self-serving, inconsiderate. Last time, it cost me the most important person in my life. And yet, I did it again.

Jill left us, but soon after Thor called her back. "A hard round for me and my friends," he ordered her, and I had a feeling he wouldn't let me get away without a drink this time. "That includes you," he finally said to the servant, patting her hand briefly before sending her away.

Thor's eyes were clouded by alcohol, but I easily recognized the emotions that they held. I knew he had no chance with Jill, which would make the situation uncomfortable for everyone. I closed my eyes with a sigh and considered my chances. Maybe I could get him drunk fast enough to fall asleep, but who knew how long that would take. The other option would be to distract him. Preferably not myself...

Before I could do or say anything, Jill was standing next to me. In her hand a tray with twelve full mugs of mead. The prince grinned with delight and moved to the side to make room for her on the bench between him and me. "Sit with us, lovely lady," he invited her. His tone was friendly, but I feared that could change at any moment. He was still a man after all.

"Don't you want me to continue serving the guests, Your Majesty," Jill assured herself, as she still had a good hour left on her work shift. "No... I want you right here next to me. Or on my lap if you prefer." Some people just can't wink without looking completely ridiculous. Thor isn't one of them, at least when he's sober. As soon as he drinks even a glass of anything, he loses almost all control over his eyes, which is why it looks like he's just squinting very tightly and then opening them again.

I could see that Jill was having a hard time keeping a straight face, but, professional as always, she followed his orders and put the tray in the middle of the table.

I had actually planned to only drink so much that I could still keep an eye on Jill and Thor, but that plan was quickly pushed into my subconscious as I took the first sip of Asgardian mead.