Inner voice

Cruel

Hey, it's me again I am feeling well bad again. I would blame it on the late hours or maybe cold showers but in reality, it's just you and me. I can't unsee the memories, the way you held me. I can't get them out of my head, they're driving me insane. I want to move on I want to live and meet someone brand new but wherever I go whoever I see it's just u and me. Oh please fucking dare. Dare to say it isn't this big of a deal, that it wasn't even real. Just dare to say I will kill, kill anything that says what we had wasn't real. I miss that shit so much, the way we talked, or maybe just smiled. I miss it so damn much and I wonder does it ever lasts.  The feeling of missing, of feeling empty, does it ever go away or are these feelings forever? I want to talk I want to scream I want reasons why did you leave. But no reason will ever make me believe it was truly just u and me. Why did you do it? Why? Why and another why and never a because. I will speak to you again it just must be a part of my fate. I know I will I'm not giving up yet, no, I am fighting till the end. I won't force you to stay because I simply can't but I will do anything in my power to get you back. The sweet little boy that holds my hand, the one that laughs, the one that doesn't care. Doesn't care that people stare, that they judge and hold a grudge. The one who never cries the one whose light never dies. But I failed to keep that one boy alive and now, well now we are miles apart not just in person but with our hearts. I miss you I do maybe not even you but the memories of something that has turned cruel.