In the Melancholy Moonlight, Part 5: Dark Matter

Chapter 273: All You Had to Do Was Stay

HARRY:

Hermione knew nothing of the Everlins. When she'd said she thought Lucy being bitten had happened closer to home, she'd been thinking of Ottery St. Catchpole, not California. She certainly understood part of the magnitude of the situation — being bitten by a werewolf under any circumstance was traumatic regardless of any other circumstances in play — but there was more, so much more, that she couldn't even begin to grasp until Lucy told her about Claire, and Danny, and Abby, and everything else.

Once Lucy had pulled herself together enough to stop crying and make her way back into the tent, I followed her in while Hermione kept watch. The two of us disappeared into the kitchen behind a silencing spell. I went through the familiar motion of making tea, while Lucy opted to break into the supply of hot chocolate that had been untouched since Ron left.

"Are you going to tell Hermione?" I asked, my voice soft even though there was a silencing spell in place.

"No." Lucy's voice was even softer. "I've been thinking about it, but she has more than enough on her plate right now. And I've been thinking about my family too, quite a bit, and... what I know now... I don't think it changes anything moving forward. It — well — obviously it changes a lot, but I'm not — I'm not going to abandon all of this and rush back to California right this instant. Based on what's in that file, Umbridge has no way of knowing the rest of my family survived. The first page of that article from Halloween of that year only talks about me. There were no other articles in there featuring pictures of my parents or my sister that were taken after the attack, they were all of the four of us beforehand. I think they're safe. I think they'd be safest if I stayed here until I can go back knowing I won't be followed by anyone who wants me dead. It would be selfish to go back now, and turn my back on everyone here, and risk bringing this war to their doorstep. My family, they — they've missed me this long. They've lived with the unknown this long. I think it'd be best for everyone if they wait a little longer."

I shook my head in disbelief. "I don't know how you do it. If it was me, if I somehow had the slightest hope my parents were alive, I'd go running back without a second of thought or hesitation. I mean, you unfortunately witnessed firsthand how my desperation to visit my dead parents, relatively speaking, led to disaster. Is that part of why you don't want to go back yet? Seeing what happened to me?"

"I've always wanted to wait," Lucy replied. "At first it was simply because I didn't want to walk up to Amos and Susan and say something along the lines of 'Hey, you kidnapped me, take me back.' Then, well, it was because Cedric was gone, and I found out in rather dramatic fashion that I was rather central to the war effort, and I didn't want to go back in that state, traumatized and grieving and preoccupied with the fate of the wizarding world. And now here I am, even more traumatized and grief-stricken and bound with both hands to the fate of the wizarding world."

I must have made a face, because Lucy rested a hand on top of mine and squeezed until I turned to look at her.

"Don't you dare feel guilty, Harry James," she said firmly. "My decisions aren't your fault. You are not responsible for every tragedy."

I nodded, glancing away and reaching for mugs as I did so. "I am quite certain your family won't care what state you return in, but I understand. Well, not that they won't care as in they'll be dismissive, I'm sure they won't be dismissive of everything you've had to endure in the years since — "

"I understand," Lucy interrupted. "Don't hurt yourself tripping over your words. I — I know they'll love me no matter what, but I think I want to have a chance to heal a little on my own first before I inflict myself upon my family."

"Lucy, you wouldn't be 'inflicting' yourself on anyone," I chided. "I rather enjoy having you around, you know."

I could hear the blush in Lucy's voice even though she was standing behind me so I couldn't see her face. "Well, yes, I'd certainly hope so, after how much time we've spent together as of late."