juno || sabrina carpenter

20. do you like it when i'm away?

SABRINA SAT IN HER APARTMENT, staring out of the window at the city below. it had been days since she and jaxon had decided to go their separate ways, and yet the ache in her chest hadn't gone away. the silence was deafening, and no matter how hard she tried to focus on anything else—her music, her friends, her career—her mind kept drifting back to him.

she hated it.

she hated how much space he still took up in her mind, how much her heart still longed for something she knew was broken. they had made the right choice, hadn't they? asking for space had been what she needed. but now that they had drifted apart completely, the emptiness left behind was unbearable.

her phone buzzed with a message from maddie.

sabrina sighed, knowing that maddie wouldn't take no for an answer. and maybe she was right. maybe getting out and doing something would help take her mind off the endless cycle of overthinking.

_______________

later that evening, sabrina found herself at a small, trendy bar with maddie, joey, and jenna. the music was loud, the lights dim, and the atmosphere buzzing with energy. but despite the noise around her, sabrina felt distant, like she was watching everything from the outside.

"so," maddie said, sliding into the booth beside sabrina, "you doing okay?"

sabrina gave her a weak smile. "i'm trying. it's just... hard."

"i get it," maddie said, her voice softening. "you guys were together for a while, and breakups suck. but you'll get through this."

sabrina nodded, but deep down, she wasn't sure if she believed that. it wasn't just about the breakup—it was about the trust issues, the doubts that had lingered throughout their relationship. and now, with jaxon gone, those doubts felt even heavier, like a weight she couldn't shake.

jenna leaned over the table, her eyes full of concern. "have you heard from him?"

sabrina shook her head. "no. we said our goodbyes, and that was it. i don't think there's anything left to say."

"sometimes," joey chimed in, "moving on is the best thing you can do. even if it hurts."

sabrina sighed, staring down at her drink. was that really true? she wondered. because right now, it felt like the pain of moving on was far worse than the pain of staying.

_______________

while sabrina was out with her friends, jaxon was sitting in the studio, his guitar in hand, the notes he played sounding hollow in the empty room. since their breakup, he had thrown himself into music, trying to bury the emotions that kept bubbling to the surface. but no matter how hard he tried, everything he played reminded him of sabrina.

it was driving him crazy.

he stared at his phone, the last message from sabrina still sitting there like a haunting reminder of what they had lost. the finality of it was heavy, and no matter how much he tried to convince himself that they had made the right choice, part of him still felt like they had given up too soon.

"man, you gotta stop this," ross said, walking into the studio and sitting down beside him. "you've been stuck in this funk for days."

jaxon let out a humorless laugh, setting his guitar aside. "i know. i just... i don't know how to stop thinking about her."

ross gave him a sympathetic look. "it's normal. breakups mess with your head. but you're not going to get over her if you keep torturing yourself like this."

"it's not just about getting over her," jaxon muttered, running a hand through his hair. "it's about everything we didn't fix. the trust issues, the doubt... it was all too much."

ross leaned back in his chair, nodding. "yeah, but maybe it's time to accept that you did everything you could. sometimes relationships just don't work out."

jaxon sighed, knowing that ross was right. but knowing that didn't make it any easier.

"so what now?" jaxon asked, his voice hollow.

ross shrugged. "now you focus on what's next. we've got the tour coming up, the album's almost done... you've got plenty to keep you busy."

jaxon nodded, but deep down, he wasn't sure if staying busy was going to help. because no matter how much he threw himself into the band, the music, or the tour, there was still a part of him that felt empty without sabrina.

_______________

despite their efforts to move on, both sabrina and jaxon couldn't shake the feeling that something was unfinished between them. they had ended things, but the emotional residue of their relationship still lingered, like a shadow that followed them everywhere.

for sabrina, every song she listened to seemed to remind her of him. every time she checked her phone, she half-expected to see a message from him, even though she knew it wouldn't come. and every night, as she lay in bed, she replayed their last conversation in her head, wondering if there was something she could have said or done differently.

for jaxon, the studio felt like a prison. every note he played, every lyric he wrote—it all seemed hollow without sabrina. he had tried to forget, tried to move on, but the truth was, part of him still loved her. and part of him always would.

_______________

the next few weeks passed in a blur. both sabrina and jaxon threw themselves into their work, trying to distract themselves from the lingering pain of their breakup. sabrina started focusing more on her music, spending long hours in the studio, pouring her emotions into new songs. jaxon did the same, working tirelessly with dead end drive as they prepared for their upcoming tour.

but no matter how busy they kept themselves, the memories of their relationship still lingered. the late-night talks, the laughter, the music they had shared—it was all still there, haunting the edges of their thoughts.

one night, as sabrina sat alone in her apartment, strumming her guitar, she found herself playing a familiar melody. it was a song she and jaxon had started writing together, back when things between them had still been good. but now, the unfinished lyrics felt like a reflection of their relationship—something that had once been full of promise, but had been left incomplete.

she stopped playing, staring down at her hands, her chest aching with the weight of everything she hadn't said. she had tried to move on, but part of her still wasn't ready to let go.

on the other side of town, jaxon sat in the same silence, his heart heavy with the same unfinished feelings.