Fatal Affection (yandere Alice Cullen and Yandere Jasper Hale x male oc)

[9]

-panic attack-
-Bennetts POV-

I sat on my bed, staring blankly at the wall. My heart raced, pounding so hard I could hear it in my ears. My mind was a mess, tangled up in a storm of thoughts I couldn't control. Alice and Jasper had left only an hour ago, but it felt like I was spiralling out of control without them here.

Dinner had been fine, 'normal', even. But then, my dad had brought up Jessica, calling her my fiancée. The shame I felt at that moment hit me like a punch to the gut. How could I explain to Alice and Jasper that this was something my parents had arranged like I had no say in it? How could I make them understand that I didn't want that? That I didn't like 'her'?

I couldn't.

And now they probably thought I was pathetic and weak. My chest tightened at the thought, and my breathing grew shallow. I liked Alice and Jasper. 'Really' liked them. More than I'd ever wanted anyone. They are the first people I will try to become friends with. But now, all I could think about was them pulling away from me, leaving me alone.

Why was I so scared? I'd known them for two days, and yet the thought of losing them made my heart clench in a way that hurt more than anything I'd ever felt before. I was being ridiculous. My mind knew that, but my body didn't seem to care. The panic was building inside me like a tidal wave, and no matter how hard I tried to push it down, it kept rising. 'please don't have a panic attack,' I begged my brain; my medication was supposed to help this.

I hugged myself, curling up on the bed, feeling my breath come in short, rapid bursts. My chest felt so tight like someone was sitting on it, crushing the air out of me. I squeezed my eyes shut, trying to focus and calm down, but nothing was working.

I kept thinking about how Alice had smiled at me during dinner and how Jasper had been so calm and kind. But then there was Jessica, my dad's words echoing in my head, making everything worse. '"Bennett's fiancée."' What if they hated me now? What if they thought I was some old-fashioned idiot who let his parents control his life?

My hands shook as I clutched at the blanket, trying to ground myself, but the panic was too intense. I could feel tears prickling at the corners of my eyes, and I hated it. I hated feeling so helpless, so out of control.

Why was I like this? Why couldn't I just be normal? Why did I feel so desperate for their approval, so terrified of losing them? It didn't make sense. None of it made sense, but the more I tried to make it stop, the worse it got.

I could feel myself starting to spiral, my thoughts racing too fast for me to keep up. My heart was pounding, my breathing ragged. I pressed my hands to my chest, trying to steady myself, but it didn't help. Nothing was helping.

My eyes landed on the project board we had worked on earlier, Alice's neat handwriting standing out in soft, elegant strokes. Without thinking, I reached for it, pulling it close and hugging it to my chest like it was the only thing holding me together. I clung to it, feeling the sharp edges of the board press into my skin, but I didn't care. It was something, 'anything', to hold onto.

Tears spilt down my cheeks as I hugged the board tighter, rocking slightly as I tried to calm myself down. My breathing was erratic, each inhale jagged, each exhale shaky. I felt like I was losing control of everything like the panic was swallowing me whole.

And then, through the fog of my panic, my phone buzzed. The sound barely registered at first, but something inside me shifted when I glanced over and saw the name' Alice' flashing on the screen.

I didn't even think. My hand shot out, grabbing the phone, my thumb swiping to answer before I could second-guess myself.

"Bennett, sweetie, it's okay," Alice's voice was like a balm, instantly soothing some of the chaos inside me. She sounded so calm and reassuring, like she already knew exactly what I was going through. And somehow, that made it worse. How did she know? How could she possibly know? But I really couldn't care less; she was here now, and I could hear her.