Feedback From Us (BYR)

𝐂𝐀𝐢𝐫𝐞𝐥𝐥3 - III

WHISPER OF THE WIND

by CAirell3

Judge JelyMarrianeSB

Whisper of the Wind chronicles the wild and magical adventure of Aeriah and her friends about finding back her lost memories and what she’s got to do with the impending invasion of the dark forces in their realm.

Slow-paced ang umpisa to build up the back story. Malawak ang sakop ng istorya gaya ng kung gaano kalawak ang genre ng fantasy na kailangan talagang maglaan para sa foundation ng worldbuilding. The presence of fantasy elements is remarkably rich. At the same time, the story is sprinkled with vibes of ordinariness that amazingly helps in reader engagement. Though, may mga tendencies na hindi nagbe-blend nang maayos ‘yung dalawa maybe because of the timing of information delivery such as focusing the fantasy narration in one part, then suddenly introducing the normalcy of her everyday activities which kinda switches off the magic moments. There is also the language independence in the information delivery wherein pagka fantasy narration, madalas naka-narrate in English, then kapag dialogues, naka-TagLish. Something needs to be tweaked on the transitions to accomplish the coherence of the narration kasi kapag nakahiwalay, parang magkaibang story ang binabasa, and we don’t want that to happen. One recommendation maybe is to deliver the story in full English. This is quite a challenge for CAirell3 but based on their command in the language, they can definitely pull it off.

In terms of the setting, CAirell3 worked their way to present an imaginative world of the outlands centered in a historic time period while incorporating select cultures of China. Whilst, the central character, Aeriah, played her role well in always being curious yet understanding of all their encountered situations, of course, with the ever supportive friends in Quilya and Marreanne who both stayed loyal to her. I liked the part where Quilya candidly withheld the whole truth to Aeriah for her to discover in due time. Very mind-boggling kung ano ‘yung reason ni Quilya, kung may ideya ba siya sa lahat ng mga nangyari, nangyayari, at mangyayari, at kailangan lang talaga niyang gawin ‘yon for her friend’s sake or what. The mystery effect effectively worked here for me.

Overall, this cup of tea is absolutely for those audiences who want to enjoy and ride along a magical journey.

Great job, CAirell3! Congratulations, again!