How to be loved

51 - For real?

How to be loved

51 – For real?

Freen's POV

"You were with her the whole time?" I asked, my voice betraying the calm facade I was desperately trying to hold onto. My gaze locked onto Becky's, searching—no, pleading—for something deeper, something that would make sense of the knot twisting inside me. "In Las Vegas? With your ex-girlfriend... for almost two days?"

Becky's throat visibly tightened at my words. She shifted, her body language suddenly defensive, like a shield going up. "Uh... yes," she admitted, the word coming out quietly but firmly. "But it was strictly work, Freen. Nothing else, I swear."

I wanted to believe her. God, I *wanted* to believe her. To trust in what we had built, in the love we shared. But the thought of Becky and Jane together—just the two of them—felt like a punch to my gut. My mind spiraled, painting pictures I didn't want to see. I raised an eyebrow, trying to mask my hurt with indifference, though I knew she saw through me. "All work, huh? Not even a quick date?" I tried to keep my tone light, but jealousy clawed at me, relentless. It wasn't about control; it was the quiet, gnawing fear. What if someone from Becky's past still held a piece of her heart? What if she wasn't as free from it as I thought?

Becky sighed, her defenses crumbling as she met my gaze again, softening. "We had a couple of meals together, but it was just that—meals. It wasn't a date, babe. I swear, if there had been a way to tell you earlier, I would have. But everything happened so fast."

She took a step closer to me, her eyes filled with a quiet plea. "I'm telling you now, the moment I could. Doesn't that count for something?"

Her words settled in the space between us. And though every part of me wanted to cling to my anger, to my doubt, I knew she was right. The trip had been a whirlwind, a mess of schedules and obligations. If Becky had something to hide, why would she be this open now? I exhaled slowly, feeling some of the tension in my body start to unwind. But the hurt lingered, the jealousy still simmering. "Yeah," I mumbled, my voice low. "I guess it counts for... something."

Becky's shoulders slumped a little, the weight of her own admission heavy on her. "I'm sorry, babe. I know this is messed up. Spending two days with my ex while you had no idea where I was... It's not fair to you. And I get why you'd be upset."

Her brow furrowed as she continued, urgency creeping into her voice. "That's why I'm telling you now. I didn't want you hearing it from someone else. You deserve better than that. Better than me keeping you in the dark."

She moved closer still, her hand brushing against my arm, her fingers trembling slightly. "I love you, Freen. You have to know that. You're my everything."

The words hung in the air, fragile and raw. I wanted to grab onto them, to hold them tight and let them soothe the ache inside me. But the doubt still lingered, a ghost that refused to leave.

"I don't want to be that girlfriend who gets controlling," I whispered, my voice barely audible as I looked away, trying to keep my emotions from spilling over. "But it's hard, Becky. I can't help but wonder... What if, while you were there, something happened? What if you felt something more?"

Becky's hand reached up, her fingers gently grazing my cheek, turning my face back to hers. "Nothing happened," she insisted, her voice steady despite the vulnerability in her eyes. "I was focused on the work. And all I could think about was how much I missed you. Every single moment, I wished you were there with me instead."

I searched her face, my heart pounding as I looked for any hint of deception. But all I saw was sincerity, honesty etched into every line of her face. "You mean that?" I asked, my voice soft, uncertain.