CIGARETTES AND TULIPS // jikook

31 - softly

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the day passed with jimin working along side his mom at the flower shop. he didn't feel as horrible as he thought he would.

but still, the guilt felt heavy in his chest.

after talking to dean, he realized how he shutted out taehyung, and jungkook, even though all he wanted was to hold them close. the memories of taehyung lingered at the edges of his mind, bringing a sting that refused to fade. 

taehyung had only wanted to understand, to be there, and jimin had pushed him away again and again. he thought he was protecting them both, but the isolation had broken tae's heart. he wished he could rewind time, show tae that he cared, that he trusted him with every fractured part of himself. 

he knew they were on good terms now, but it just wasn't the same. it felt like everything that had happened with dean sort of isolated him from taehyung. taehyung just didn't understand how jimin stayed for so long. it made them drift apart and even after the drunk talk they had after dean left jimin alone - it didn't bring them back completely. 

jimin felt like taehyung hadn't 100% forgiven him. it felt like they had grown apart but jimin didn't want them to grow apart. all he wanted was his best friend by his side.

by the end of his shift, the sun had softened, casting a warm glow over the street outside. he had forced himself to text jungkook, so the raven head was waiting outside now.

jimin took a deep breath and stepped outside. it had been days ever since he last saw jungkook.

"hi"

"hi"

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they walked side by side, and though neither of them said much, jimin felt jungkook's quiet gaze, watching over him. he knew jungkook could sense something was wrong, but he didn't push, just offered his silent presence, grounding jimin with each step.

as they reached a quiet spot by the park, jimin finally gathered the courage to speak. 

"i don't know where to s-start,"  he began, his voice barely above a whisper.

jungkook stopped in front of him. his eyes were focused on jimin's. his gaze was soft. he was a bit afraid of what was to come.

"i w-want to get to know you m-more," jimin stuttered and felt himself blushing. he quickly looked down at his feet, feeling shy suddenly.

jungkook felt his heart skip a bit at those words. he looked at the beautiful blushing mess in front of him and couldn't believe the words that just left his precious lips.

"really?" he asked, his mouth left slightly open.

"more than anything," jimin confirmed shily and still avoided jungkook's burning gaze. "i... realized something today,"

"yes?" jungkook asked timidly, his heart beating up his throat. he didn't understand why that boy made his body react like that. he didn't understand how he could fall so hard for somebody. he was craving more, more of jimin's words, more of his attention.

his voice trembled, his hands curling into fists at his sides. "i was so d-dumb, jungkook. i shut you out even though i wanted nothing more than to be near you. i tried to play it cool and be safe b-but it made me just crave y-you more "