Avengers Age Regression Oneshots

Swear

Tony rubbed his temples as he worked on a blueprint in the kitchen, muttering to himself while a mug of cold coffee sat forgotten nearby. Peter, who was currently in little space, sat on the floor with a pile of Legos scattered around him, happily building something that looked like a cross between a rocket ship and a dinosaur.

It had been a relatively calm morning—until Tony hit a snag in his design. Frustration built in his chest, and before he could catch himself, the word slipped out.

"Damn it!"

Peter's head popped up immediately, eyes wide like a little hawk. "Daddy!" he gasped, sounding genuinely scandalized.

Tony froze. "Oh no..."

Peter slowly stood, hands on his hips, giving Tony the most serious, disapproving toddler face 

Tony had ever seen. "You know the rule, Daddy."

Tony groaned, slumping dramatically in his chair. "C'mon, Pete, it just slipped out! It doesn't count if it slips—"

"It does count," Peter interrupted firmly, wagging a finger at him. "One cookie."

Tony gave him a playful glare. "You're too strict, kid. I should've made you pay me in cookies every time you don't listen."

Peter crossed his arms, unmoved. "Nope! Daddy swears, Daddy gives a cookie. That's the rule."

Tony huffed but slid off his chair, shuffling toward the pantry with exaggerated defeat. Peter followed close behind, watching like a tiny law enforcer to ensure his daddy followed through.

Tony pulled a box of chocolate chip cookies from the shelf, opened it, and handed Peter one with a sigh. "Here, you little dictator. Happy?"

Peter's entire face lit up as he took the cookie. "Thank you, Daddy!" he chirped, skipping back to his Legos with a bounce in his step.

Tony shook his head, unable to hold back a smile. "You know you're the bossiest little spider ever, right?"

Peter nodded through a mouthful of cookie. "Yup!"

Tony chuckled as he sat back down at the table. "I'm going to need another coffee if you keep this up..."

And just as he picked up his mug to take a sip, it happened again.

"Ugh! This stupid—" He caught himself just before swearing, clamping a hand over his mouth.

But Peter heard the almost swear and turned toward him with a gleam in his eye. "That's close enough, Daddy," he declared. "Two cookies now!"

Tony groaned dramatically. "You're going to run me out of cookies at this rate."

Peter smiled sweetly. "Then don't swear, silly."

Tony couldn't help but laugh. "You know, you're way too good at this."

Peter grinned, crumbs on his face. "I know."

And Tony knew then—there was no winning this game with his little spider. But honestly? He wouldn't have it any other way.