Why Do You Care About Me? - A Reese Wilkerson Fanfiction

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Hi yall. tysm for almost 6k readsss. and also tysm for reading this far theres only a few chapters left :O I started writing this when i was in such a bad place and i think this was partially what helped me out and now im in a way better place. enjoy yall <3

"Reese, what's wrong?" Mom asked me from the kitchen. I just stood there, in the hallway, illuminated by the shafts of early morning sunlight. The question almost caused me to burst into tears. She could tell I was upset, even if she didn't know why. She dropped the knife she'd been cutting vegetables with and rushed over to hug me. I couldn't hold back the tears as I hugged her back.

It just felt like a part of me died. I felt so empty. She was really gone. A pit of dread formed in my stomach. I didn't know if I would survive the summer, or the school year without her. I was alone. Again. I didn't even know where she was going. I didn't have a phone number or any way to possibly contact her. I would never see her again. I didn't even have anything from her or a photo to remember her by. She was merely a stunning, doe eyed girl in my memories that would get hazier over the years, yet would never be forgotten.

 She had changed my life forever. Yet I would never know who she grew up to be. Or if she ended up happy. Endless regret gnawed at my body. I'd promised her that we'd always be friends. That night she'd came home from hanging out with her friend, crying. That I'd always be by her side no matter what. 

Yet we we're kids for God's sake. We don't actually have nearly as much control over what happens in our lives as we think we do.

Jesus, does anyone?

Even though it didn't last long, I knew couldn't be sorry it happened. My life had been miserable without her, and she'd lit up my world even if it was just for a while. She gave me a taste of how beautiful life really was when you had people like her around. And I had memories of her to treasure and reminisce for the rest of my life. 

Yet I'd never be able to experience the same amount of joy ever again. I would never see her again. And she was the one. And I let her go. Just like that.

I'd thought me and Georgia were just friends who'd maybe kissed once, but her absence made me realise what it truly was. It was love. Not a stupid crush. Love. But now it was too late. And now she'd never find out how I really felt. And I'd never know if my feelings were reciprocated. 

All these things I'd never ended up saying. All these things we never got around to doing.

Mom didn't really say anything while I dissolved in her arms for what felt like centuries. There wasn't really anything she could say. She just hugged me tightly, as she rubbed my back comfortingly, so I could let it all out. She was there for me. Something that seemed so simple and basic, yet Georgia never had that. She didn't have a mother who she could trust and who she could know would be there for her no matter what. Or a father for that fact.

An hour later, I was sitting on the couch, mindlessly eating several packets of chips and watching TV. Everyone decided it was best to stay out of my way for a while, and let me be alone, which was exactly what I wanted. I couldn't handle the shame. The shame of being such a fucking loser. Every few minutes, the thought of Georgia would surface and I would burst into fresh tears. I missed her more than anything.  And it had only been a few hours. I wasn't going to be okay.

Malcolm eventually mustered up the courage to come and plop down next to me on the couch. 

"How you doing man?" He nudged my arm and reached for my food. I didn't know what to say. Even if I did, I knew no words would have come out. He sighed. "Look. I know you really liked her, but you'll get over it, I promise. I mean, I've been heartbroken over so many girls, yet look at me. I got over it. You'll be okay." Here comes Malcolm with his life advice for which definitely has enough experience to be giving. I knew he was trying to be comforting, yet he wasn't particularly good at it, unlike Georgia.

I carefully took another chip and placed it in my mouth, focusing on not setting off the waterworks again. Yet it was no use. I burst out crying, for the I've-lost-how-manyeth time, choking on my chip while I was at it. 

"Jesus Christ, man. You're a mess." Malcolm scoffed, giving me a dirty look and leaving me again, thank God.

He was right. Now, that I didn't really have anything in my life worth living for I would live in the past for the rest of my life and end up being an unhappy old man who wasted his life away feeling sorry for himself. People have to move on, but I didn't think I could.

As I stared at the TV, I tried to picture those sparkly brown eyes that had taken my breath away countless times. Yet I couldn't. I couldn't remember what they looked like.

Now that she was gone, I didn't have anyone or anything to motivate me not to fuck up my life. I knew that definitely wasn't healthy, but what the fuck do you want me to do. I was going to grow up to be the fucked up delinquent everyone was so sure I would end up as and already saw me as. Georgia was the only person that ever saw me as anything more than that. She was the only person that ever understood. She was the reason that I woke up in the morning. Because she was the only person that actually believed in me. 

And I knew it was my duty to do the exact same thing for her. Because I was forever grateful. We both needed each other. Thats how these things work. Soulmates.