Why Do You Care About Me? - A Reese Wilkerson Fanfiction

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Hi everyone! I really wanted to finish this by the end of the year but ive been so busy its actually not okay. so yeah sorry about that. ALSO 9.4K? TYSM!!! ALSO WE REACHED OVER 1K READS ON FIRST CHAPTER! so heres a pretty long chapter for you lot and I just wanted to say how thankful I am to everyone that has read this far. Even if there would be only one person reading it would still be enough <3 thank you guys so much you don't know how much this fanfic means to me and im glad people like because I was really scared to post it at all but im so glad that i did. Im definitely going to write another fanfic once i finish this one. Enjoy <3

I was going to do it. I felt relived to have made that decision yet worse because I was now queasy with adrenaline and fear. It was 10:30, but the explosions of laughter from downstairs hadn't ceased, and it didn't seem like they weren't anywhere near stopping. 

I went downstairs into the kitchen, where everyone seemed to have reappeared and we're now having a family gathering at the dining table, playing cards, as they waited in the queue for the shower. I didn't even bother asking where everyone had been an hour and a half ago. 

"Georgia, do you wanna join?" Caleb asked me. I looked at him in surprise. I didn't expect to get invited, and I was starting to feel guilty all over again. 

"Sure." I choked out. It would take my mind of things for a while. I had thought about taking a nap instead so I could catch up on the sleep I was currently loosing and going to loose, but I knew I wouldn't wake up and couldn't exactly set an alarm since I would be sleeping in a room with my whole family. I was fervently wide awake because of what I was planning to do anyway. 

We played for another 20 minutes maybe, the game slowly dying down as everyone went to shower and didn't return to the table. I was one of the last people to take a shower, and since gran lived in a really old house, all the water had to be heated up in the furnace somehow, and everyone had already used the heated water so I settled on an icy cold shower since I didn't really have a choice. I thought it would also be a good call to wash my hair, since I'd be on a bus for the next few days.

I lay in bed, my wet hair soaking my pillow, pretending to be asleep and waiting until everyone else was asleep, planning everything out. I was going to call Reese from the phone box at the gas station. I would need some loose change for that. Next I would take a bus into town to the bus station in the city centre. I would buy a ticket for an intercity coach service. How much would that cost? I would be driving across pretty much the whole country. Probably a lot. I'd have to steal some of moms money. Sorry mom. 

After I waited for what felt like years for everyone to fall asleep, my hair already fully dry, I slipped out from under my covers, sweaty with impatience. I carefully picked up my bag I'd repacked a few hours earlier to be full of only essentials I would need for the journey. I crept down the extremely creaky stairs, cringing at every step, and into the bathroom. 

Lets just hope that if anyone heard that they'll just assume I needed a piss. 

After blinding myself by switching on the light, I changed out of my pyjamas and into jeans, a t-shirt and a hoodie in case it got cold.

I didn't risk turning on the light in the kitchen, even though I couldn't really see, but after clumsily making a few sandwiches that would last for a day or two, my eyes had adjusted to the darkness pretty well. Mom's wallet was in her bag she left on one of the kitchen chairs. I took most of her change, but she definitely didnt have enough notes for an intercity bus ticket.

Fuckkk.

Sudden loud rustling upstairs made me jump, saying it was time to get the fuck outta here. I just grabbed a few of the notes and stuffed them in my pockets along with the change just in case.

I'll figure something out.

I shoved moms purse back in her bag and paused for a second. Grans watch lay on the table. She'd probably left it there before she went for her shower. It might be useful. After a second of hesitation I grabbed it off the table. It was 12:09. There wasn't enough time to hassle with putting it on my wrist right now, so I just shoved it in my pocket for now and hurried along the cold tiled floor of the hallway, into the porch and shoved my shoes on. My heart was pounding as my sweaty hands were trying to unlock the door. It finally cracked open, revealing the cool summer night beyond. Relieved, I leaped outside and swung the door shut, so eager to be outta there that I forgot that I was trying to be quiet. 

Shit.

It kinda came as a shock to me how much less welcoming the garden looked in darkness comparing to day. Running to the front gate, I noticed lights turning on inside. I didn't have a lot of time. As My sweaty hand pressed the cold and rusty handle of the gate open I thanked God it wasn't locked. Flinging it shut behind me, I decided it was best to run for a while. I didn't particularly want my life to turn into a Terminator chase scene. Because there was simply no way that nobody woke up from all the noise. There was a very high chance someone would be chasing me down the road any second. So might as well get a head start at least because I was definitely not a good runner, but it was better than nothing. I wasn't a sporty person at all, really, which funnily was actually the reason that I met Reese. 

As I ran down the deserted road, only lit by the occasional lamppost, if not broken, casting a  murky yellowish hue onto the concrete, the contents of my backpack rattled every time the soles of my shoes landed on the ground. The fields I wandered during the day were now an endless dark void, the trees that had shielded me from the sunlight now forming creepy shapes in the darkness. At night, the world does seem a lot more dangerous and scary, and its a lot easier to get stuck inside your head, but in its own, twisted way, its still breath taking.

All of a sudden the reality of the situation hit me like a truck. 

I was running away from my family in the middle of the night and stealing my mom's money to get a bus back across the country when she'd spent the past several days driving us all the way here. All for love. Literally what the fuck.

That and my embarrassing stamina resulted in gradually coming to a halt, bending over with my hands on my knees, panting uncontrollably, attempting to catch my breath as I observed the concrete below my battered shoes. Still panting, I stood up straight, put my hands on my hips, and spun around on my heel, the trees in the corner of my eye freaking me out, which almost made me loose balance and fall into the ditch alongside the road, to make sure there really wasn't anyone chasing me. Because it sure seemed like it. 

But the road was still deserted.

Still trying to get my breathing pattern under control, I craned my neck up and gazed in awe at the clear, deep blue night sky, scattered with constellations and a pristine and glowing crescent moon. Looking at it almost felt surreal. It was quite literally infinite, and here I was, this tiny little human so caught up in her problems that seemed so huge and overwhelming, making huge, stupid decisions that don't seem so huge anymore.

There's 8 billion people in this world. And we all look up at the same sky and are probably reminded of the same thing. We're small, the world is fucking massive, and nothing we do really matters in the long run. This humungous universe, this beautiful world, why is it even here? Why am I even here? Is there any point in this?

I'd say believe in God, the thought does soothe me a lot and I guess it just gives me something to believe in and assurance that everything is going to be okay which I am so grateful for, but I guess I just prepare myself for the worst. But... even if it all pointless... does that really make it any less valuable?

Life can get hard sometimes. But we get to experience this beautiful world, know all these wonderful people, who I always try to remind myself in moments like these, are all in this toghether with me, yet it's way too easy to get stuck on the things we don't have. Even if it's really hard sometimes, wouldn't it be better to try to enjoy the ride while it lasts?