GENESIS FOR GEN Z

CHAPTER 24

So Abraham was super old, like really up there, but still living his best life 'cause God hooked him up big time. He tells his top servant, the one running all his stuff, "Yo, put your hand under my thigh because we're about to make a serious promise here. Swear by God, who's got the whole upstairs and downstairs, that you won't get my boy Isaac hitched to one of these local Canaanite chicks. Nah, you gotta hit up my old stomping grounds, back to my crew, and snag a wife for Isaac from there."

The servant's like, "But what if this chick isn't down to bounce back here with me? Am I supposed to drag Isaac back to where you're from?"

Abe's all, "Absolutely not. My son stays put right here. The big boss upstairs, who got me out of my dad's place and promised me all this, will send an angel to make sure you find the right girl for my son from my fam. But hey, if she ain't willing, you're off the hook. Just don't you dare take my son back there." So the servant does the whole thigh thing and swears he'll find Isaac a wife, but not from Canaan.

He then loads up ten of Abe's camels with all kinds of goodies and heads off to Mesopotamia, straight to Nahor's hood. He parks the camels by the town well at go-time for water drawing, figuring it's prime time to spot the ladies.

He's like, "Okay God, you hooked up my boss Abraham. Now, how 'bout a little love for me? Make this mission a smooth one." Standing by the well, he's plotting, "Alright, when one of the local girls comes out to get water, and I'm like, 'Hey, can I get a drink from your pitcher?' and she's all, 'Sure, and let me water your camels too,' that's the sign she's the one for Isaac. That's how I'll know you're still looking out for Abe."

He barely finishes his spiel, and boom, Rebekah shows up, water jug in tow, straight out of Abe's family tree. She's drop-dead gorgeous, untouched, heads down to fill up her jug. 

The servant dashes over, "Hey, can I have a sip from your jug?"

"Sure thing, boss," she says, quickly pouring him some water.

After he's had his fill, she's like, "Let me sort out your camels too," and she does, until they're all good. She's all in, filling up the trough for the camels, running back and forth to the well, making sure they're quenched. the servant's just watching, mind-blown, trying to figure out if God's made his journey a hit or not.

As soon as the camels are done, he whips out a gold earring and a couple of fancy bracelets, thanking her. "So, who are you? Got room at your dad's place for us to crash?" he asks.

"I'm Bethuel's kid, Nahor and Milcah's granddaughter. Yeah, we've got space," she replies. "And hey, we've got plenty of feed and room for you guys," she adds. Alright, let's break it down Gen Z style:

Dude was super grateful, hit the deck, and bigged up the LORD. He's like, "Big shoutout to the LORD, my boss Abraham's VIP, for not ghosting us and leading me straight to the fam."

Rebekah, full of the latest tea, dashed to spill to her fam. Rebekah's bro Laban, upon hearing the 411, yeeted to the well to check out the scene. Seeing the bling and catching the vibe from Rebekah, Laban was like, "Yo, gotta see this guy," and found him chilling with the camels. Laban's like, "Bro, why you loitering outside? Got a spot ready for you and your camels."

So, the guy and his camels got the VIP treatment, a place to crash, and a spa day for their feet. But when food was served, he's like, "Hold up, gotta spill why I'm here first." Laban's all, "Spit it out."

He starts, "I'm rolling with Abraham. God's been mad good to my boss, hooking him up with all the swag. Sarah, my boss's wifey, got him a kiddo at her retirement age, and he's the heir to the whole Abraham empire. Boss made me pinky swear not to get Isaac hitched to a local Canaanite chick. Was told to hit up my boss's fam crib to find a wifey for Isaac. I was like, 'What if she ain't down to bounce back with me?' Boss man was confident, 'God's got us. He'll send an angel to make sure you find the one. If the fam doesn't vibe with you, you're off the hook from the promise.' So, here I am at the well, praying for a sign from the big G upstairs. I'm like, 'First girl to offer me and the camels a drink, she's the one. And boom, Rebekah shows up, offers me a drink and waters the camels too. Didn't even finish my prayer, and there she was. Told her to hit me with some water. She's quick, drops her jug, and hooks me and the camels up with water. I asked her, 'Who's your daddy?' She says, 'Bethuel.' So, I blinged her out. I'm all, 'Thank you, LORD,' for leading me straight to my boss's fam. Now, if you're gonna treat my boss right, awesome. If not, let me know where I stand."

Laban and Bethuel are like, "This is all God's doing, we can't argue. Rebekah's, right here. Take her, let her be Isaac's wifey as God said."

The servant went full worship mode, thanking God for the win. Then he pulls out the gift bags, loading Rebekah and her fam with shiny things. After a feast and a sleepover, he's ready to dip at dawn. "Let me bounce back to my boss."

Her fam's like, "Chill, let her stay a bit more." But he's not having any delays.

"Don't keep me here. God's made my trip lit. Let me get back."

"Cool, let's ask Rebekah what she wants," they said. Rebekah's like, "I'm down to roll with this dude."

So they send her off with blessings, hoping she becomes the matriarch of a massive tribe. They bless her to be the queen bee of countless peeps and conquer her haters.

Rebekah and her squad hit the road on camels, following the servant back.

Isaac's out in the field, catching vibes, and spots the caravan rolling up. He's out there getting some fresh air when he sees the crew approaching. Rebekah peeps Isaac, hops off her camel like it's hot. "Who's that guy?" she asked. Servant's like, "My boss." So, she goes incognito with her veil.

The servant spills everything to Isaac. Isaac brings her into his mom's tent, and it's official - they're married. He's all heart-eyes for her, finding comfort after losing his mom.