Blurred Lines

~Reflection~

⚠️Mental Illness⚠️

BRANDON'S POV:

Kali's been acting weird. She's distant and she keeps looking at me like she's trying to piece something together.  She's been like that since yesterday. Ever since that little incident with Hilary.

I know doing what I did was a risk but Hilary was talking too much. I needed to shut her up and make sure Kali understood where I stood with her in the same breath.

Apparently that just made her more suspicious. She's acting like nothing is wrong but I can see it in the way she looks at me. She's worried about something. I don't know if it's me or her.

I'd ask her but I feel like I'd do more damage than good. Forcing her to be around me seems cruel. I don't want her to feel suffocated, not right now.

She's vulnerable right now. If we hadn't fucked I would be fine with asking her but since I crossed that line I can't say anything. Not when she could take it the wrong way and think I was only using her for her body or something.

I knew doing this was a bad idea. I should've just waited. I shouldn't have rushed into things without thinking of all possible outcomes. I SHOULD have overthought this.

"Brandon," I sat up from my bed and looked around the room. I rubbed my neck in confusion before I sighed.

I could have sworn I heard someone say my-

"Brandon," What- FUCK!

I jumped up from the bed and rushed into the bathroom. I slammed the door and locked it before I walked over to the mirror. I stared at myself until my reflection shifted.

"Brandon." The man in the mirror said smiling. I should probably explain why I'm referring to my reflection as "The man in the mirror." The short and quick answer, I have Dissociative Identity Disorder. I think. I could just be crazy.

You see, my reflection is me. But not me right now. It's me from......well I don't know. It looks like me, sounds like me, but it isn't me. That version of me is different. He doesn't feel the way I do. He's the me that I hide.

Mostly from Kalani, but the guys too. They know I'm messed up but they don't know about this. No one does. And I'd like to keep it that way. The more people that know the less control I have over it.

This version of me is scary. He doesn't have emotions at all. He's a homicidal maniac if I'm being honest. He's the reason I started killing people in the first place. He's the reason I'm afraid to love Kali.

"What do you want?" I asked quickly.

"She's afraid of us. You know that right?"

"I'm not stupid."

"That's debatable. Why aren't you fixing it?" I sighed before leaning against the sink.

"I can't force her to talk to me."

"That's where you're wrong, Brandon. You CAN force her to talk to us. You just won't."

"I'm not gonna do that to her."

"What? Make her talk about her feelings? It won't kill her to sit down and talk about what's bothering her. You're being ridiculous."

"No, I'm being cautious. I've spent years walking on eggshells and I refuse to fuck this up now."

"You already did. She won't even fucking look at us. Hell, she slept with Austin last night because you freaked her out. She hasn't said a damn thing all morning because you aren't making her. She's not gonna say anything until we do."