Blurred Lines

~Scars That Never Healed~

Nick's POV - A Week Later:

It was finally time for us to go visit my mom and I was a nervous fucking wreck. My mom called earlier this morning just to be sure that we were still coming and that made me panic even more.

She sounded so fucking excited and shit. I honestly thought about telling her Kali had gotten sick and we couldn't make it but I figured that would make me the world's worst son ever.

I honestly have turned around and brought our suitcases back in the house twice already. After the second time I locked them in the car and gave Kali the key so I could try again.

I don't know why I feel so weird. Well, I do but I don't know why I can't control it. I'm flustered and my hands are sweaty. I keep stuttering when Kali asks me something. Everything is just wrong!

Maybe it's all a sign. A sign from God telling me to stay my ass home and tell my mom I can't make it. But then she'll be so upset and I'll feel bad.

Fuck! Why is this shit so complicated? I should've visited earlier so I didn't have to deal with this shit. Without that evil bitch coming this wouldn't be so fucking complicated.

The thought of having to see her makes my skin crawl, knowing that I'll have to sit and have fucking dinner with her makes me want to jump into a fucking volcano.

I wonder how soon I could book a flight to Hawaii? Or Indonesia? They have active volcanoes throughout the year. I could book a flight today! Jump right in one without a problem.

I can't do that, that's overdramatic. I could just jump off a cliff or into a waterfall or- No. No. NO. I'm fine. It's fine. I can go see my mother and be in the same house as that viscous she-devil without having a mental breakdown.

Possibly. Well, I think but I'm not as sure as I'd like to be. Who the fuck am I kidding? I'm gonna have a fucking panic attack and I haven't even left the fucking house yet.

I can't do this shit. I can't fucking go there and be around that women. I won't last 10 minutes in her presence. Much less DAYS! I haven't seen her in so long I don't know how I'm gonna react.

What if I just break down? IN FRONT OF MY MOM?! She's gonna think I'm insane or something. Oh God. I think I'm getting dizzy.

"Nicholas Buchanan! Do you hear me talking to you?" Huh? What?

I looked up and saw a very frustrated looking Kali standing in front of me. Apparently she had been trying to get my attention for a hot minute because she looked like she was seconds from smacking me.

"What did you say?" I asked quickly.

"What's wrong? You've been sitting here staring at the wall for the last 10 minutes. You haven't even blinked!" Oh shit. It didn't feel that long.

"I'm fine. I-I just got lost in thought." She sighed and sat down on my lap. She wrapped her arms around my neck and softly kissed my cheek.

"If you really don't want to go, maybe we shouldn't. I know you care about your mom and I know you feel like you owe her this, but not at the expense of your mental health. Nick, you're a mess. You have been for the past three days, rightfully so. If you really can't stomach this, we don't have to go."

"Kali, baby. I have to. I-If it gets too bad, then we'll leave. Simple as that. Okay?" She didn't seem convinced but she nodded anyway.

"Okay. We should get going, we want to get there ten minutes before the devil." I nodded and she quickly slid off my lap to grab her purse.

"I'll be in the car. I already kissed Austin, Tristan and Brandon goodbye." She said before she headed back downstairs.

I sighed and ran my hand through my hair before going downstairs. I didn't bother saying goodbye, mostly because I don't like any of them enough to actually care.