stefanielle/marina one-shots

the end.

i'm pretty sure most of us are heartbroken over the news from earlier and i don't know how else to deal, so i wrote. i know ive been gone awhile but i haven't had any inspo and sadly we don't get to see anymore of maya and carina. i hope all of you are doing okay and i know it doesn't mean much but we will be okay and we will get through but we need to stay. i know it doesn't look like there is any chance or any positives but we will eventually be okay and we all need each other :).
if you don't agree with me that's fine but keep your opinions to yourself and i hope you like this, even though it's not very happy :(. (also this is just a general wlw imagine - not specifically stef and dani - sorry!)

"hey baby" i say as she opens the door, sets her bag down, and sits in the passenger seat. she looks at me, her eyes less green than normal, and she smiles, not letting it reach her eyes.

a heavy silence falls over us as she reaches over to hold my hand, placing a light kiss on the back of it.

i turn out of the parking lot of her work, i offered to pick her up so we could be together and try to stay hopeful with the coming decision looming over our heads.

ever since i was 12 and realized i was gay, i have wanted this life. to have a woman that i love and was able to marry, to love her with all of my heart and know she's the one. to want to do everything with her just because she makes life so much more enjoyable. to want to pick her up from work and cook dinner in our kitchen together just because we want to spend every minute together. to want to come home to the women i love every night and get to tell her how much i love her.

this is exactly what i've wanted since i was 12, and there is a chance that in a couple hours, our lives could be ripped apart.

we continue the drive home, my mind drifting the those poor teens who don't have parents and friends they can come out to, whether they know they aren't supportive, or live in a red state and have no one to trust. the poor kids who have to deal with this alone and we're in the same situation as me, and not know if they will get to love in their lifetimes. the innocent souls who have done the same as i did and dreamed of a day they could fall in love with their person, waiting for the day they could marry that person and have it recognized by the state, for a day they could go out in public and not be given looks and snide comments. for the day they had freedom.

and in hours that could be taken away.

pulling into our driveway, i'm snapped back to reality as me and my wife slowly move to get out of the car. both of us hoping that the slower we move, the slower time will go, and we can put off this dreaded election for even a few more minutes.

we walk in the door and I set the keys down and she sets down her bag, both of us silently walking upstairs to change.

i take off my work clothes, and so does she. i pull my favorite hoodie of hers over my head and some pj shorts over my legs, she follows suit. pulling her favorite hoodie of mine over her head and some sweatpants over her legs. she walks to the bathroom to grab a hairtie to put her hair up and i pull mine into a low braid.

she turns to look at me with tears in her eyes, mine lock with hers and i pull her into a tight hug trying to muster all the hope i have.

after a few minutes i pull away and look her in the eyes, "it will be okay. everyone has worked their asses off for her to win and now we just have to trust that people will use their brains and do the right thing. there's no way he can get a second term and we just have to wait for the red mirage to pass and then we can pull through, okay? i love you forever and nothing can stop that, so we just have to hope" i tell her, trying to believe it myself with every fiber of my being.

she nods back and presses her lips to mine, both of us trying to express all of our feelings without words.

we hug one more time, our spirits lifted slightly, breathing easier, as we walk downstairs and into the kitchen.

deciding on spaghetti for dinner we put some noodles into boil and set a timer. in the meantime i turned on some slow music and took hold of my wife's hand. both of us silently accepting this might be the last moment before chaos, whether she wins and the other side calls voter fraud, or god forbid, she looses.

we waltz around the kitchen, my head rested on her chest, listening to her heartbeat, her hands wrapped around my back and drawing random patterns under the fabric of her sweatshirt.

after a couple minutes the timer goes off and we dish out the pasta and pour some sauce and parmesan on the top before walking to our living room.

we sit down and turn on the tv.

already playing, was information about the main battleground states, polls that called them in a dead heat, all possibilities of each candidate winning, and the ways they could end up tying, sending the race to the house.

we listen to the newscaster drown on and on as votes from each state slowly pored in.

states going from red to blue and back to red. tension high as polls close one at a time.

•••

it's been hours and our eyes have been glued to the screen for hours, not a single vote counted that we haven't seen.

as another commercial break starts we look at each other and she craws over to me, laying down in between the couch and me, resting her head on my chest. i kiss the top of hear head, rembering the first time we cuddled like this. it was one of the first few nights we spent together and we had dinner and talked and talked and she had opened up about her childhood and a few other things. once her eyes started to tear up, i immediately pulled her onto my lap and kissed the top of her head. ever since, no matter what is happening, she will always come lay on my chest, and i will kiss her head, silently telling each other that everything will be okay and that i love her.

however, i don't know about that this time. i just genuinely don't understand what people think is so wrong about two people in love? so what if it's two girls? so what if it's two guys? we are all people and we all deserve love. just because my love might look different from yours, doesn't mean i am undeserving of it.

i am brought back to reality as he wins pennsylvania.

then georgia.

then wisconsin.

and it hits me.

he's going to win.

and there is nothing anyone can do.

•••

it's been another hour since it's been called and we have just been staring glassy-eyed at the tv, hoping that maybe there was a miscount, an extra number, more votes that had been forgotten. anything.

but nothing changed, so we turned off the tv and headed to our room in silence.

not bothering to change or get ready for bed, we crawl under the covers and i switch off the light. "i need to hold you" she almost inaudibly whispers. i move over into her open arms and lay my head on her chest.

after a few moments i shift and look at her eyes. with tears threatening to spill from both of us, i say "we will be okay. we have each other, no matter what, and no one can break us. we've been through so much and are so strong, so we can doubt anything else, but not this. not us." i tell her with every ounce of truth in my body.

she nods and replies, "i love you even more and i never want to lose you".  i smile and press a kiss to her lips, "well that's perfect because im never going anywhere".

i lay back down and she wraps her arms around my body, tracing her fingers along my back. as our breathing evens, and our eyes get heavy, we drift off to sleep. wondering if our love will ever be deemed illegal, for a second time during our lives.

i don't know if i will ever come back to writing often, but thank you so much for the support on this book!! i love you all so much!