To Catch Your Fall | Heathoah

32. Brother, Thou Art a Hypocrite

TW: Homophobia, homophobic slurs, mentioned internalised transphobia

Izzy

What do you do when you find out a member of your family is one of the biggest hypocrites you ever met?

I never wanted this. Never planned on getting involved in the dumb shit that Ozzy is does in his life. But, I just had to overhear a conversation between him and two of his "friends".

Pete and I had just finished up going over our duet. Anything is better to do in this place than to process what happened with Winnie. So, I've been staying here late most days. Pete didn't mind though. He has a lot of fire, and really wants to win this. 

I was going to get a drink, because I was sweating buckets. When I almost got run over by Finn. He gave some vague form of apology, I think? I don't know. I was paying more attention to his face. 

Don't think I'd ever seen him even get a little close to crying. But, his cheeks were all puffy, and his eyes were red.

I'd heard some talks around the place about him acting a bit weird. Thought he was just high though. 

Either way, when I looked at where he was going and saw Ozzy with Kingston coming towards Finn, I leapt behind one of the corners. I'd been able to avoid him for months and I wasn't going to break that streak now!

There was a lot said between those three. Crazy what people say when they think nobody is listening.

"So, you gonna fucking grow up yet or just keep avoiding us?" That's how Ozzy started it all. 

"We've been saying shit like this for years. Why only now are you turning into a snowflake and getting offended?"

"Wait...have you turned gay or something? Please no! Cannot handle the fact that I've been friends with a fag!" That was Kingston. 

The two of them had been saying their usual shit for a few minutes, going from one insult to the other. But Finn still hadn't said or done anything. 

Until that sentence. When he opened his mouth, it felt like I had let out all my anger with Winnie into a punch upon my very own gut.

"You say all this as if both Henry and I don't know that you two have been fucking each-other for years now!"

Nothing....nothing could have prepared me for that. 

Anyone else could have taken it as him just talking shit. Trying to stick up for himself against their accusations. 

But, neither of them deny it. I can't see their faces. They're probably looking at him in shock, and I hope shame, for finally being found out.

All of us just stand there, not saying anything. There's not much else to say. 

Only then does it click in that I could've found out all of this sooner if I had just caught him a bit earlier all those months back. I can't blame myself for not thinking of Kingston that time.

Ozzy, that fucking asshole who left me to suffer from the abuse of my father when I still lived with him. The guy who made sure a day didn't go by without telling me he didn't support me.

For making me feel sick, disgusting and ashamed of myself. Those thought still sometimes come up, even to this day. 

He has been caught with another guy! 

There is nothing else I would rather do then to go out there and beat the shit out of him for being the biggest fucking hypocrite ever! To scream every horrible thought I have had about him above the years and right now.

So, when Finn scoffs and walks off, I present myself.

Ozzy's eyes bulge, and he knows. He knows I heard everything.

And like he always does, he runs.