To Catch Your Fall | Heathoah

23. How Is He Here?

TW: Panic attack, mention of sexual assault

Noah

Tapping my foot like a cartoon rabbit, I wait for Ethan and Marcus to stop bickering so the rest of us can start working on the small group.

Starting to regret putting both of them in this dance, But, if I had to listen to another one of Ethan's rant about how he deserved a dance at Nationals, I was going to slam my tongue in a door.

"I can't believe-oh fuck this! Noah, do you think it's wrong that Ethan has started seeing an older guy?"

Marcus breaks me away from my self-suffering thoughts as he calls for me.

No, they are not bringing me into this.

"Uh, how much older? Cause aren't both of you 18?" I sigh as I engage with them.

"Exactly! I'm an adult now and he is only 23! That's only a 5 year age gap." Ethan yells at his teammate.

I guess I can't judge him. There were definitely people older than that that I got with at his age. Plus, it's not like Ethan just turned 18. So, we really shouldn't judge him for it. 

"Marcus, look. Ethan's an adult, and this guy is only in his early twenties, so-"

"That's what I was saying! I bet he's actually just jealous I'm actually dating someone and invited my new man to come see me practice today."

"See, so its not-wait, you what?!"

Turning back to Ethan, I got to yell at him for not telling me. We're not opposed to none dancers coming to watch us from the sides. But that is usually reserved for family members!

"And you're only telling me this now?!" He just smiles at me as if everything is okay. Why was I siding with him?

"Don't worry, he won't get in our way. Plus, we can't do much now because he just walked in." There is someone behind me that he points at. So, instead of berating Ethan, I go to apologise for the fact we can't host this man.

When I see who it is though, every part of me freezes in place. There in-front of me is the lanky, brunette man with that utterly fake kindness on his face, which I never wanted to see again.

Nick's eyes leave his...boyfriend, who just kissed him, and looks at me. Anyone else would see his expression as nothing but welcoming, but I know better than anyone what truly hides beneath.

I think a few of the dancers, go to say hello to him and wonder why I'm not doing the same. My feet are glued to the spot. there is nothing I can do. It's like his eyes turned me to stone.

No...he can't, he can't be here! How could he dare come back after everything that happened. After everything that he did?!

Emily! Where is Emily? She can do it! She can sort him out like last time. There is no way she'll let him stick around after seeing him!

It's becoming harder to watch him with each passing hour. Black orbs surround my vision, as if they're showing me what he's really like. Like I don't know.

There's a buzz. No, not a bee's. That is warm sweet and fluffy. This...this is a stabbing my ears!

While everything crumbles around me, my chest does the opposite and continues to rise.

Then...I fall!

~~~

I wake up what seems to be a few hours later, judging by how dark it is now. Everything looks so blurry, and when I move, a sharp pain goes through the back of my head.

Somebody says...something. It feels like my ears are clogged. They hold lightly onto my arms and I realise they're looking over me.

For a moment, I am terrified that it's Nick. Having drugged me and trying to do to me what he failed at that time.

The tanned, handsome features settle in to view though. Black curls cover his forehead, and soft, brown eyes are covered in concern as they seek mine.

"James?"