Roadtrip // Kubokai

Fireworks

After spending an entire night in the bathroom, every single one of Kaidou's muscles was in pain. He didn't sleep at all. One hour he spent lying on the floor, thinking, but not for a minute did he manage to close his eyes.

The situation was wrong, but somehow he still chose to stay in it than move forward in some direction.

It was around five in the morning, when he decided to leave. He could barely walk, but by some miracle he managed to make it to the kitchen.

Mrs Aoki was standing by the stove, preparing an omelette in a pan. She looked at Kaidou. Her eyes widened.

"My boy, you look terrible! Did something happen?" She asked politely and put her omelette over some white rice.

"I just... I couldn't sleep" he partially lied, as he took a seat on a stool by the island counter.

"Really?" She smiled gently "I would never accuse you of lying, but this night I've heard two people chatting on my back porch, your eyes are red and swollen and forgive me, but you smell like vomit. It might be just me but I'm assuming something has happened tonight, and for some reason you don't want to share it with me" she rested her shoulders on the other side of the counter and started eating her breakfast.

"Yeah well, it was more than that" he said. His brain hurt him too much to try keeping on lying. He rubbed his eyes and instantly regretted it. He wanted to cry again, from all that physical pain.

"You look like someone who needs a long, relaxing bath" even a thought of going back to the bathroom made him nauseous.

"Now I just need to sit for a minute in silence" he responded and put his head on the counter. It was pleasingly cold.

Mrs Aoki smiled again and didn't say anything. She ate in silence and quietly put her plate in a dishwasher. Then she sat next to Shun and put her hand on his back. Her touch was gentle and calming as she was rubbing him down and up his spine.

"When I first saw you, I thought you looked so similar to my youngest son. You remind me of him"

"And you remind me of my mother" he answered without thinking. But it was true. Something about her elegance mixed with being a parental figure, made him think of his mother, in a good way "But she wouldn't like seeing me like this. Like a total mess"

"No mother would want to see her dear child like this. It's painful, to look at love of your life, crying, broken, or anything like this"

He sat up and looked at Mrs Aoki. She didn't stop rubbing him, and he didn't even realize how much he needed it. How much he missed his mom. He chewed on his bottom lip, until he decided to confess to her.

Shun told her everything. His voice was shaking, and breath was uneven, but the more he spoke, the more he realized how relieving it was. She listened to him carefully. He finally told her everything.

"Sounds like an awful situation to be in. Now let me ask you something" they looked at each other. Kaidou never felt this small "Why do you think it hurts you so much?"

He wanted to reply fast, but he realized he had no words for an answer. He was constantly opening and closing his mouth but no sound would come out of it.

"Maybe because... Well... Because... Heck! I don't know! But it hurts! Maybe because I can't imagine losing my friend, and yesterday it felt like a begging of an end, and because I don't want him to get hurt especially by me. And because I don't know what I feel to him! I'm so confused and I feel like I owe him explanation"

"So you're saying there's a 'maybe'" he nodded not understanding were this was going "Did the thought that there could be something going on appeared when he said he likes you, or was it here before as well"