Roadtrip // Kubokai

Storm

When they arrived to the Airbnb, Saiki immediately rushed to his bedroom, leaving Kaidou alone.

He was so confused he didn't even know what to do with himself. So instead of doing anything useful, he just wandered around. He didn't even bother to turn up the lights. Later, when he started bumping into furniture, he kind of regretted it, but still didn't do it.

One part of him just wanted to disappear.

He finally sat by the small table in the kitchen. He was playing with his fingers, while thinking deeply about the situation.

If it really is what I think it is. If I really... Like him, then I'm

I'm

I'm absolutely fucked.

He couldn't explain why he felt like it was such a problem, but it was and he was convinced he had to do something about it. But right at that moment he was lost. He had no idea what to feel or what to do. So he tried to not overthink it too much for now.

The front door opened with this terrible creak. Kaidou's muscles flexed. He focused his gaze on the details of wooden table and didn't dare to look that way.

He heard somebody's heavy steps and painfully loud sobs. He knew exactly who did it belong to. Sometimes he hated knowing things.

The door shut loudly behind that person. Kaidou sighed and stood up. He wasn't sure if something happened after he left or was alcohol just doing it's stuff in his friend's brain, but despite the reason, he sounded miserable.

Aren Kuboyasu looked even more pathetic in person. He's sat in his bedroom in an armchair, hidden his face in his hands and cried quietly.

Kaidou looked to his right, and noticed Saiki was already asleep, so he tried to be extra careful while bringing his friend a glass of water. He put it on a dresser and was ready to leave, when Kuboyasu pulled him by his shirt.

"I'm s-sorry" he murmured and tightened his grip even more "Please stay"

Kaidou felt a lump forming in his throat. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. Then, he crouched in front of his best friend and waited for him to speak.

"I'm sorry for ruining everything. You wanted to have one good night and I messed it up"

"It's not that it's-"

"At no point it was fault of yours that those guys came up to you. I shouldn't have said that. I don't know what I was thinking"

"I suppose not much... You know, I don't think I've ever felt this humiliated before, like when you said it was my fault. Great that now you know how stupid it was"

"You did nothing wrong and I shouldn't have fought with you. And you had every right to be mad at me and..."

"Aren" he got cut off "I accept your apology"

"No, stop, why? I'm such an asshole, for fuck sake! I can't even control myself!"

"Why are you saying that? These two deserved that. You just protected me"

"No, I mean, yes... ugh!.. It's not about it... kind of. Yes, they deserved all of that and even more but I'm not the one who should be punishing them. For many reasons, but mostly for the fact that I just can't get into any fights because... that thing I used to be is still with me, you know?"

"What do you mean?"

"Imagine being locked in a house covered in gasoline, holding an always working lighter in your hand. It's only up to you and your patience whenever the house is going to burn or not"