Beach Babe | The Outsiders | Johnny Cade

| Clarity | 65 |

After my two weeks is up I'm allowed to be discharged, since I'm now eighteen I can do it myself. My birthday was yesterday, November sixteenth. Tomorrow is Theo's. I fill out all the paperwork and they let me go. Dr. G, in a sheer act of kindness, gave me a hospital sweater, a jacket, some old jeans, and some warm boots. He also gave me a one-hundred to help me out. The police took my clothes when I got here so I had nothing but scrubs. I quickly changed and when I stepped outside it was snowing, I've never actually seen snow before, and seeing it was like a dream come true. It wasn't cold enough for it to pile up but just seeing it was like being in a fairytale.

I walked down the street aimlessly for a while, I get strange looks from passerby's, they all must know about everything that's happened. I still can't even really think of it, talking about it to  Dr. Clarkson has helped greatly for me to understand it and my emotions but it didn't make anything any easier.

While I was stuck in the psych ward I developed a plan to get out of here, I'll break into my old room get all my money, cram as much of my stuff as I can into two duffle bags then head to Pensacola, Florida. I can't remember why Florida stands out to me but I want to start my new life there. I wish I didn't have to but there's nothing for me here.

The bell on the door jingles as I step into the salon, based on the looks I get I assume they all know.  I pay for a haircut and sit down, the person in the mirror in front of me isn't Stacy. She has dark heavy bags under her eyes, pale skin, and a gaunt frame. Nothing like the girl from a few months ago.

I get my hair cut to my shoulders, when it's curly it bounces up to chin level. It looks.. cute. I've never had hair this short before, my hair before was nearly down to my hips. I tip the lady when I leave and head to the nearest sporting goods store, I buy two duffle bags and boxing gloves. I'll leave it as a gift for Theo. He might want nothing to do with me but he turns seventeen tomorrow.

As I walking towards my neighborhood, Leah, of all people, catches me. "Stacy! Oh my god! You're alive!" She squeals and hugs me. I awkwardly pat her back, human touch feels so foreign to me. "Where've you been?"

"Hospital." I answer flatly. Snow falls into her eyelashes.

Her face pales and she looks around awkwardly."Oh.. well- I'm guessing you haven't heard anything?" She sighs.

I furrow my brows. "Heard what?"

"The wars over. Greasers vs. Socs, it's done. Everyone hangs out everywhere now. It's done!"She smiles, I can see her brother further down the street smoking with someone.

I faintly smile at that, at least the rumble and all this death has caused something good. "Good, good. I'm glad." Possessed by some random urge I hug her tightly. "I missed you." I say honestly, I did miss her. I missed everyone, staring at the same beige walls for three weeks makes you miss everything.

She hugs me back tightly, I honestly don't remember the last hug I got. This feels so nice. "I'm so sorry about, August." She whispers softly. I hug her a little tighter before pulling away. I wipe my eyes.  "You wanna go get some coffee?" She asks me sweetly.

"I'd love to, but some other time. I'm heading home. I just need some time to process, y'know? But definitely sometime in the future." She nods and waves goodbye. She walks over to her brother, and only then I notice the brace on her left leg and ankle. Poor girl.

I continue my walk home. When I reach my house I just stare at it for a moment, before creeping in as quietly as I can, I know my mom is here, I can just sense her. It looks like Christmas exploded in here. I roll my eyes and go up to my room quickly. I stuff all my favorite things into the duffle bag and anything extra I feel like having. Once that's done I throw the boxing gloves into a gift bag, write a short note, and start to head back downstairs. The moment the floor creaks on the first step Theo's door opens.

He freezes and just stares at me. Tears flow down into his shirt and he hobbles over to me and hugs me as tight as he can. "Oh god, I thought you died. Oh god, oh god, oh god- Stacy!" He sobs violently and tightly clutches my shirt. "They wouldn't let me see you, in- in the hospital. God, I tried so hard. I missed you! I thought I lost you too. Please, please don't do that again. Please!"

I hug him with the same tightness, sobbing with him. I thought he was done with me, but hearing that he tried to see me makes me feel a warmth I hadn't felt in a month. "I love you. Thank you for taking a bullet for me. And thank you for not dying." I say.

He weakly chuckles and pulls away. "Thank you for killing that bastard. His parents didn't even try and deny he was crazy. The trial lasted like thirty minutes."

Oh. The trial. My mind just blocked it out. I technically had a trial for killing Jesse, but because I was in the hospital I didn't have to attend. Jesse's family flew out to testify against him and say that I did it in self-defense. He went off the rails and tried to poison his whole family before he left for Tulsa. Theo had to talk about how Jesse attacked him, I can't imagine how awful that was for him. I was declared not guilty because it was in self-defense.  The city and Jesse's family paid a huge sum of money for damages, emotional and physical. Luckily it went straight to me and not my mom. I'll use it to pay for medical bills and a college fund for Theo.

"Where.. what's with the duffle bags?" He glances down at them on the floor, I must've dropped them when I hugged him.

"Oh.. I was planning on moving to Pensacola. Get a fresh start." I say and sigh. Now I don't know what to do. "I don't know if I still will."

"Please don't. Please. Don't leave me here with Mom and her stupid boyfriend." He pleads. As if on cue I hear her laugh. She's laughing? All of her children are completely fucked up and she's laughing?? God, I forgot how much I hated her. Horrible woman. "I'll be in my room, Stace. Please don't leave." I nod and he goes back into his room.

I walk back downstairs to see my mother and her boyfriend - I forgot his name - walking in with shopping bags. She sets them down when she sees me. "Stacy? When did you get home, dear? What happened to your hair?" She reaches for it but I grab her wrist and shove it back. "Where've you been?"

"Hospital, psych ward. They wouldn't let me have visitors." I say lowly, glaring at her. She nods and looks around. "Well, lucky you! You didn't have to deal with reporters trying to knock down the door every hour!" She laughs like it was a genuine problem she had.

"Lucky?? Lucky? I had to watch my friend, boyfriend, and nearly my brother die and that's lucky?" I'm shouting now. "I had to take care of two rowdy teenagers while I also was one! That's not lucky! My little brother is dead! My twin is dad! My father is dead! Nothing is lucky about that!" I was right in her face, screaming, chest heaving. "You were supposed to be our mother!"

She doesn't look phased. "Go take a walk, Stacy. Maybe it'll clear that broken brain of yours. I'll be gone by tomorrow morning."

"You're leaving again?"

"Yes. I have a life in Texas I have to get back to. I'll put the house in your name. You won't have to speak to me again. I'm done with this chapter of my life." She says calmly, it nearly makes me try and stab her. Instead, I turn and start to walk out. I pause when I see three urns on the mantle. Three. A large one, and two medium ones. Two. August.

Tears roll down my face as I say one last thing to my 'mother'. "I hope your spot in hell is as hot as the furnace your sons were burned in." I say with so much venom it almost surprises me. I walk out and slam the door as hard as I can.

I walk for over an hour, I've been around the neighborhood three times, and my anger hasn't died down. It's properly snowing, fluffy white puffs of snow fall onto the ground all around, and it's started to even pile up.

I pause in front of one specific house and look up at it, I didn't mean to come here, really didn't. I stare at the house and watch silhouettes move in the window, I can hear laughter, yelling, talking. It's nice to know they've moved on and can enjoy life. After I let a few tears slip I turn and walk away.

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Thanks for reading!!

Word count: 1616