Her Steps (GS #1)

Chapter 10

I stopped.

Of course I stopped. I had to think straight. This woman in front of me is not just some woman I picked up. She's an innocent woman I really can't bear to be tainted.

"Jhie... Am I not... good?" I stopped on my tracks and closed my eyes.

"Am I still not enough?" Oh God.

"Hindi ba ko mabilis matuto? Hindi ba ko magaling? Hindi ba ko... masarap?"

"Cut it out, Tienn!" I looked back at her.

Her eyes were full of confusion. Her hair's so messy, her top's crumpled.

"I can't... I just can't."

"Why? Am I not like them? Can I not be like one of them to be liked by Ray as well?" I don't want Ray to like you, fvck it.

I don't know if I can bear to even think that Ray is kissing those damn soft lips. I can't think that Ray is banging you insanely. I don't want Ray to lay even a finger on you.

But of course I won't say that.

"Tienn..."

Her eyes are now teary.

"I... I just wanna be liked rin. I wanna change for the person I like... I—I want..." She burst out into tears.

Great, Jhie. Just great.

I went near her and pulled her into a hug. I did not speak. I just hugged her and tried to comfort her until I found ourselves hugging on her bed.

Tienn's already gone back to a deep sleep while I think of the things happening these past few days. I caress her hair as I plant small kisses on top of her head.

I can't stop myself but to think, what if Ray's the one lying beside her, hugging her like this? Kissing her? Damn it, why am I thinking about these shits?

Mula umpisa, my role was to turn her into a woman that Ray would like. I'm not even sure if Ray would like her romantically or someone he would just bed. I just thought maybe if I turned her into something like me, Ray would like her? Because Ray liked me. But why am I seeing things differently? Hindi ko yata kayang ibigay kay Ray ang inosenteng babaeng ito. I don't want him to see her as soft as this, I don't want him to see her cute side. I don't want him to see what I've been seeing which has been my question too... Why am I seeing her differently?

Like Ray, she's not my type. Hindi ko siya gusto. Isa siyang bata sa paningin ko. Right, maybe I'm just caring for her as I still see her as a kid. Ayaw ko pa siyang mamulat sa mga bagay na pinaggagagawa namin ng mga kaibigan ko. She's so pure and she's not ready for such things. I cannot bear to be the person who opens her mind to things that can ruin her purity.

Hindi ko namalayang nakatulog na pala ako and when I woke up, my eyes landed on Tienn's. She was sitting comfortably on the floor, her arms folded on top of the bed with her head on top of it and tilted on the side, and her right cheek being squeezed by her own arm. Shit, what a sight in the morning.

Nabigla siya nang mapagtantong gising na ako kaya naman nailayo niya ang mukha sa akin.

"G-good morning!" She awkwardly said.

"I uhm... cooked breakfast." I just stared at her.

"W-what? Bakit ka nakatitig? Is there something in my face?" She immediately touched her face.

"Sabi mo hindi ka maalam magluto?"

"Just pancakes..." Sabi nito at akmang tatayo na pero mabilis kong nahigit ang kamay niya, causing her to get her face closer to mine again. I stared at her captivating eyes and gulped. How I wish I could see these eyes every morning.

"B-bakit?"

"Just wanna make sure I'm not drunk anymore and I'm not dreaming." I squeezed her wrist I'm holding before letting her go.

I saw how her cheeks turned red before immediately running out of the room.

"Y-you can use my spear stuffs on the bathroom. I'll wait for you downstairs!" I heard.

Bumangon ako at hindi ko maiwasang ngumiti. Wait, why the hell am I smiling?

I did as I was told. I took a bath without even thinking about what to wear but some pair of clothes caught my attention. They were neatly placed on the backrest of her fur coated chair and when I looked at it, there was a sticky note on top.

You can use these. Sana kasya!

There was a brand new underwear, pero walang bra. The pair of clothes were shorts and a sweatshirt. Hindi na ako nag-inarte pa kahit pink yung sweatshirt. Isinuot ko na rin iyon. Hindi naman ganoon katingkad ang pagkapink nito kaya ayos na rin pero hindi pa rin ako sanay sa mga ganitong damit.

I went down and saw her patiently waiting on the sofa. She immediately smiled when she saw me.

"Let's eat!" Hinila niya ako sa dining and saw some perfectly cut fruits, pancakes, and cups.

"Do you drink water, coffee, tea, milk, or juice in the morning?" Ang dami namang offer nito.

"Calm down, it's just me."

Napaiwas siya ng tingin.

"You're... the first visitor I ever had." She bit her lower lip.

"I thought you mentioned to your parents that you've been bringing friends—," I stopped when I realized she might have just told her parents that but it doesn't actually happen.

"Let's eat." Bawi ko at hinila na rin siya paupo. I saw her smile.

"Try these, these are my favorites!" She put some grapes and blueberries on my plate. Hindi ko na siya pinigilan at kinain na rin ang mga inilagay niya sa plato ko.

"Ahm, I saw you at the uhh..." Hindi niya maituloy ang sinasabi niya.

"Kagabi sa... story ni Kelon Rivera?" Napatango tango ako sa sinabi niya.

"You're friends with him on socials?" Tumango rin naman siya.

"Sorry talaga, I didn't know you were out with your friends." Kasi hindi naman kita niyaya when they told me to ask you to come.

"Hey, it's okay. No worries." I let out a smile to show her it's okay.

But then I realized... That means she saw Ray and I kissed.

"Are you okay with the uhh... story?" I awkwardly asked.

She let out a small smile before saying, "It's not the first time I saw you guys kissing."

And I dropped the grapes.

...

GS #1: Her Steps
LightRainC