Imperfect Hearts

Chapter 17

Adam

He clenched his head as he paced around the living room.

He felt boiling rage inside of him.

He was so angry.

How could she talk about Lucy? Or even think that way of her?

She didn't have the right to throw judgments.

She knew nothing!

He gripped his hair.

And all he did was asking a stupid simple question. Although he knew he shouldn't have but he still did.

He was fuming with rage as he flopped down on the couch.

He held his head between his hands.

Their argument had brought out so many old memories and emotions in him.

He missed Lucy so bad. He had missed her so much.

But now that he looks back to it. It's not the same as before.

He isn't missing her like he used to.

Sure his heart aches and longs for her every single moment but it's not the same.

He doesn't cry anymore at nights. He hasn't had nightmares for a while now.

And that only made him more angry.

Because he knew the reason why it's not the same anymore.

He knew it like the back of his hand.

It was Farida.

The same annoying Farida who gets under his skin like no other.

God he was mad. He was so mad.

He sighed loudly before laying down on the couch.

His mind full of thoughts. Of Farida. Of his past.

His life before meeting Farida was somehow dull. But it only needed a fierce lightning bolt for him to crack.

It only needed Farida.

Its like that light you saw at the end of the tunnel but no matter how much hard you tried to reach it,  it only seemed more far away

And Farida was that light. That hope.

He longed for it. He ran for it but it was like no matter how hard he ran he just couldn't reach there.

And today it was like Adam saw a whole new piece of Farida.

He felt this tiny happy bubble inside of him when they had lunch. They were both so relaxed and carefree.

They were talking to eachother and they were enjoying each other's company.

He felt the bubble of happiness fill in within him.

The same  bubble he hasn't felt since he lost his brother so many years ago. Since he was a little kid.

The bubble he hadn't felt even when he had married Lucy. Even when Ali gave him a life he could never have imagined.

It was just pure happiness.

He was happy with her.

And that scared him so much. Almost enough to make him go running.

But he only wanted to stay. To just be with Farida. And hear her laugh and smile.

He felt at peace, his heart was relaxed after so many years. And as he felt that light coming closer and he was so close to reach it and see what was after this tunnel. It was gone again.