Unspeakable Acts (bwwm)

30 - The End

| Alyssa Mitchell |

I don't come out of my room. Not after the door slams behind Jaxon. Not after the house fills with that awful quiet that feels like it's pressing in on me from every direction. I lock the door and sit on the floor with my back against it, breathing like I've forgotten how to do it right.

The first day blurs together. Light shifts across my walls. My mom knocks. I don't answer. She leaves a plate outside my door. I wait until I hear her footsteps fade before grabbing it and locking myself back in. I eat because my stomach hurts, not because I'm hungry.

My phone keeps lighting up. Jasmine, over and over. Calls. Messages. Missed calls stacked like guilt. I turn it face down, i just want to be left alone. I don't go to school. I don't open the curtains. I don't shower until late that night. I lie in bed replaying every word Jaxon said, especially the ones that landed sharp and stayed there.

I hate you, I tell myself. I say it out loud just to hear something in the room besides my own breathing.

The second day, KB comes over. I know it's him before anyone tells me. I hear his voice downstairs, joking too loud, trying too hard to sound normal. I hear my mom explain that I'm not talking to anyone. I hear his footsteps on the stairs, i hoped when she told him that he'd give up and just leave.

"Alyssa," he says through the door. "It's KB. I'm not here to be funny... I just wanna make sure you're good."

I sit on my bed and stare at the door.

"You don't gotta talk," he adds quietly. "Just... knock or something so I know you're okay."

I don't.

After a long minute, he sighs. "Alright. I'll be around."

The third day, my mom stops waiting. She unlocks the door with the master key while I'm sitting on my bed in the same hoodie I've been wearing since the night he left.

"This can't keep going," she says, firm but not cruel. "You've missed too much school."

"I don't care," I mutter.

"You do," she says. "And you will later. You need to go back before it becomes a bigger problem."

I hate that she's right. So I get up. I shower. I get dressed. I grab my keys and leave without saying anything else.

My Camaro feels wrong without him. The seat beside me is empty in a way that hurts. I almost turn around twice on the drive to school. But I don't.

The second I step onto campus, already feeling it. The looks. The whispers. People don't even bother pretending anymore. I keep my head down until Jasmine appears in front of me.

"There you are," she says, relief flooding her face. "I've been calling you."

"I know."

She studies me. "Are you okay?" what a stupid question.

"No," I say honestly.

She nods. "Okay. Then just stay with me today."

By lunch, the rumors are loud enough to trip over.
I'm standing near the vending machines when I hear Kyle's voice behind me. the same kyle that tried to assault me at the beginning of the school year.

"What a bitch," he says, laughing. "Guess he finally realized nobody wants her."

Something inside me snaps so clean it's almost quiet.
I turn around slowly. "What did you say?" I ask.

Kyle grins. "You heard me, bitch."

I don't hesitate. I step forward and punch him square in the face. The impact is solid, i'm pretty impressed with myself. He goes down hard, collapsing like his legs gave out all at once. The cafeteria goes silent except for the sound of someone gasping. Kyle groans and tries to sit up, blood already pouring from his nose.

I step closer. "You talk about women the way you do because you can't get one," I say, my voice shaking with anger. "You hate us because none of us want you."

People are staring. Phones are out and I don't care.
"And don't worry," I add, leaning down just enough for everyone to hear. "Your husband's probably waiting for you somewhere."

The cafeteria explodes with laughter. Kyle's face burns red as he struggles to stand. A teacher rushes in then, grabbing my arm, shouting my name. Kyle is still bleeding, humiliated, furious. I don't fight it when they pull me away. My knuckles ache and my chest feels lighter.

*Third Person*

KB is leaning against his car after school when his phone rings. He steps away from Jasmine, who's mid-rant about administrators, and answers it. "Yo."

"Hey," Jaxon says.

KB immediately recognizes the background noise. Traffic. Voices. Somewhere warm. Somewhere far.
"California?" KB asks.

"Yeah," Jaxon says. "Sunny as hell."

KB snorts. "Of course it is."

There's a woman's voice in the background, laughing softly about something KB can't hear. He pauses.
"Who's that?" KB asks. "it's only been 3 days jaxon."

"Just noise," Jaxon says quickly. "How's Alyssa?"

KB exhales. "She punched Kyle today."

Silence. Then, quietly, "She okay?"

"She knocked him out cold," KB says, smiling despite himself. "Embarrassed him in front of the whole school. Cafeteria lost it."

Jaxon exhales a short laugh. "Good."

"She's not okay though," KB adds. "She's hurting."

"I know," Jaxon says. "Just... keep an eye on her."

"I got her," KB says. "You handle your shit."

"Yeah," Jaxon says. "That's the plan."

| Alyssa Mitchell |

When I get home, my parents try to talk to me about school. About punching another student. About consequences. But I walk past them and go straight to my room. I shut the door and I lock it.

I sit on my bed and stare at my bookshelf. My eyes land on the book Jaxon and I read together, the one he pretended not to like. As i pull it down something slips out and lands on the floor. A photo. It's me, asleep, curled into his chest. His arm is wrapped around me like I'm something precious. I look peaceful. Loved.

There's a folded note taped to the back. The date is months ago. Before everything broke. My hands shake as I read it.

If you ever find this, I hope it's on a day you need to remember how loved you are. Loving you changed me. in a good way, i can really be myself around you...please keep your head up. especially in the times im not able to be there physically for you. Always. your, J.

My chest caves in. I press the photo to my heart and cry until it hurts everywhere. When the tears finally slow, I fold the note back up and hide it under my mattress. I tell myself I hate him. I repeat it like a spell.
Because hating him feels faster than healing. And loving him hurts too much now that he's gone.

The end. For Now.

iiii just want to say thank you guys so much for bearing with me through this whole book. through my hiatus and all. the support i've seen has made my heart swell. i'm excited for the second book to come out, it's in the works and almost halfway done. and i swear no hiatus will be taken. the second book will go deep into the organization, the background jaxon comes from and much more. i know i said the story is not about the mafia but the next book will be more gang related. i hope you guys enjoy. and i hope u enjoyed this story as much as i've enjoyed writing it.
i appreciate all the love and support .
luv taiga <3