HANGANG [BTS:RAP MONSTER]

18 // Why?

After the kiss I really didn't know what to feel and what to do. When he left I leaned against the door and my heart went crazy, it was like my heart could jump out my chest any time.
But what are we now? I mean he kissed me so that means he likes me and there's something from his side too. What should I do? I can't just ask him what we are now.
Okay, I ended up doing it anyway.

>...What are we now...?< 5 am.

Some may say I'm crazy but yes, I stayed up the whole night thinking about whether I should ask him or not. In the end I sent the text at 5 am. Of course he didn't answer, he was probably sound asleep. But when he still didn't answer at 4 pm I really freaked out. Did he just wanted to kiss me and see if I have already fallen for him? Wasn't it serious?
I sat in the living room constantly looking at my phone.
I let out a loud sigh right when my mom entered the room.

"What's wrong sweetie?"

"Uh oh nothing mom.."

I looked back at my phone and she sat down beside me.

"You can't fool me, so tell me what's on your heart?"

"Namjoon isn't replying..."

Yes, she knows about him. I was talking to Ga Yoon on the phone and she listened and wanted to know everything after. You can't keep a secret from her. She even googled him because she knew him from the news. Ugh.

"Did something happend between the two of you?"

"Mom can you stop asking questions. I love you but I don't want to talk about it.."

"I understand that but sometimes it's better to talk. Just call me if you want to."

She hugged me and then she went back to the kitchen. Maybe she's right and it's better to talk but I really don't want to...
After another 2 episodes of 'Hello Counselor' my phone buzzed and I went crazy when I saw that Namjoon was calling me.

[Don't ask questions just meet me at Hangang please.]

[What? When?]

[Now.]

He hung up after telling me that I should come now. Why does he want to meet me there now? It's could outside and dark. Since I'm curious I got dressed, explaied it to my mom and left.
When I was half the way I got a text from Namjoon.

>Changed my mind, don't come.<

That's what it said, and that's what I did. I didn't come. Tears fell down my eyes while I was walking back home.

----Namjoon POV----

After I had called her I rushed out and went to Hangang. On the way I wanted to call her again but I forgot my phone and it was to late to go and get it. I hope she comes.
1 hour passed and she still wasn't there, why isn't she coming?
I gave up on waiting and went back home just to find Suga holding my phone in his hands while just looking at it. What is he doing with it?
He didn't even realise I was there so I coughed and he turned his head in my direction.
He looked at the phone and then back at me.

"What are you doing with my phone?"

"I-I was just calling you and then I heard your phone ringing in here so I picked it up wondering why you left it since you never go out without it."

"Oh okay, just give it to me then." I said.

Suga struggled to hand the phone back to me but he did anyway, I could see his forehead sweating a bit. What's wrong with him?
I didn't ask him and just went into my room trying to call Yejin, she picked up at the third time.

[What?] Her voice sounded angry.

[Why didn't you show up? I waited for one hour at least.]

[Oh well that's funny because you texted me not to when I was already half the way.]

Her voice cracked a bit, is she crying?

[What? I never did that, I couldn't even because I forgot my phone at the dorm. ]

[That's like the last time you didn't reply to my text. I'm getting it, you don't like me but you don't have to do this to me. Just leave me alone Namjoon, I can play myself you don't have to do that.]

And with that said she hung up. What did just happen? I felt like I was about to cry but I didn't. I never sent that text, I know that. Fate is really taking it hard on me.

▪▪▪▪Suga POV▪▪▪▪

[Don't ask questions just meet me at Hangang please.]

[What? When?]

[Now.]

I heard Namjoon talking on the phone as I was about to finally tell him about Yejin. But he rushed out the door not listening to me. I saw that he left his phone so I picked it up. He's going to meet her again... I can't let that happen.
So my second mistake happened, I texted her from his phone.

>Changed my mind, don't come.<

I clicked on send and regretted it right away. What did I do?
When Namjoon came back home I just sat there looking at his phone, and when he wanted it back I got really scared. I didn't delete the text. Fuck.
I handed it back to him and I really wanted to tell him everything but I just couldn't.