Mute Songbird (boyxboy) -Complete-

Udder madness

The next few weeks flew by. Now that Dan was back everything just seemed easier. He was super busy with make-up work and the play so I decided that I needed to weasel my way into play practice. It was the easiest way to spend time with him. He got me a job helping with the lights which was actually really amazing. Looking down at the stage from up in the rafters was a lot of fun and I learned a lot. Plus, I got to stare at him every time he stepped foot out from behind the curtain and I did not mind that a bit.

We'd done six shows and had two more to go; the last show was going to be this Friday and then next week was finals. The seniors were pretty much already gone; at least half were out of school on any given day. Graduation was Saturday and they didn't care. I didn't blame them; I wanted to be finished too.

His parents were easing up on him, slowly. I guess he'd been right, it just took them a little time to get used to everything. There were no sleepovers but I was allowed back in his room and I spent a lot of time laying on his bed watching movies while he did homework next to me. It was just about the favorite part of my day.

We snuck in some one-on-one time too, just he and I. It felt amazing to be close to him and block out the rest of the world. We hadn't risked going all the way again, that was not something either of us wanted to do while we were scared of getting caught. Besides, his parents would have NEVER forgiven us and that was NOT the way I wanted to come out to my dad.

My dad had finally gotten over the drinking incident although he did make me do chores all week. I didn't blame him, I had really messed up. And even better, guess what was in my bag? My phone. Yep. I had promised my mom not to use it to talk to people in the same room and I'd made so much progress that she trusted me with it. I'd missed my 'goodnight' texts from Dan so much and was immediately 10 times happier.

I didn't wake up one morning miraculously speaking as well as I had before the stroke, but once I had the first dozen words the next 100 followed easily. Well, easy for me. I still had to think out my sentences and I found myself trying to rework what I wanted to say so that I could use words I knew. Mrs. Maldonado had figured that out pretty quickly though and had me reading out loud to her for part of my sessions.

There were still lots of things that gave me trouble and a few that were still impossible. Names. I don't know why, but I couldn't wrap my head around names. Numbers. They were different than the other stuff I had trouble with though, they simply weren't there. If you asked me how old I was I could write it easily but the number wasn't even in my head. I couldn't even THINK fifteen. It was weird, but I was trying not to worry about it. Tenses. I had a really hard time conjugating verbs and stuff but it was random. I got them mixed up within sentences and sounded like a foreign exchange student. That wasn't really fair to the German students because their English was probably better than mine.

But you know what? I didn't care. I didn't give a rat's ass, as my mom would say, that it wasn't perfect. I felt like I could get through the day, you know? As long as people gave me time and I didn't try to recite the Declaration of Independence or anything, I could manage. Of course I still got frustrated with myself but I guess I had finally accepted the fact that I was getting better; CIT was helping.

Dan had been amazing. We'd gone to Burger King last weekend and he had refused to order for me but he'd stayed right by my side and helped me when I got flustered by 'milkshake'. I'd done it though, and if push came to shove and I had to, I knew I could do it alone. He seemed to know that I was nervous about doing everything for the first time and he managed to make me do things without being pushy. Well, not TOO pushy anyway.

I don't know how he managed to not laugh at me through all my stuttering and mistakes. He'd only laughed once and I'd laughed first because I had accidentally said 'It doesn't udder bitch' instead of 'matter much'. He'd held it together until I said 'moo' but he'd ended up on the floor. I had too, it was nice to release some tension and we had made up cow jokes for days. Most of them weren't even funny; we were annoying to everyone but ourselves. I didn't care; our own tiny world was safe and amazing and I hated every single time I had to leave it.

Summer was coming quickly and so was the end of dad's 6-month contract at work. I was trying not to think about it but how could I not? I was going to spend every single second I could with Dan and hope for the best. I'd tried to ask dad how he felt about the chance of getting an extension or even better a permanent placement but he brushed me off. I got it, he didn't want to think about it any more than I did and he had no control over it.