Mute Songbird (boyxboy) -Complete-

Secrets

"ASHER! Door!!" My father yelled from the living room, which was in fact right NEXT to the front door. But, being the amazing son that I am, didn't even throw anything at him when I walked past him to open it.

"Hey Asher!" Dan said happily. "I brought my books."

He seemed so proud of himself that I gave him a thumbs up and let him in.

"Your room?"

I nodded and followed him up the stairs. As soon as I was inside, he swooped behind me and closed the door.

"Was that YOU yesterday?" he demanded. "I didn't want to say anything in front of your parents and embarrass you or whatever but was it? In choir? The chorus?"

I sort of dipped my head and shrugged and tried to not look completely embarrassed.

"Do it again! Please?" he asked.

Okay forget not being embarrassed, I was now panicking and doing my best impression of a deer caught in headlights. I shook my head no.

"I will do anything! What do you want? My hat? A piggy-back ride? For me to show you the hole in the female teachers bathroom?"

My mouth dropped open and then flopped around like a fish because I was fucking GONE.

"Oh god not to WATCH! No, no, but you can hear them talking. Oh god, not... EWWW!" And then he laughed. He laughed so hard he ended up on the floor.

I joined in, then couldn't stop. I had tears, literal tears rolling down my face.

"I don't WATCH! What kind of sick fuck do you think I am?? I don't go over there, I just know about it. Oh god. That is NOT something I want to see! You must think I'm a total perv! I'm not, I swear." He was almost as flustered at me at this point.

I managed to calm down just enough to scribble messily: But Mrs. Maldonado is pretty?

"Yeah, she is. Still not my type."

Mrs. Vitko-Littlestein? Don't tell her husband!

"Mr. Vitko? No, no, he's her brother!"

That's less creepy. They look too much alike. So what is your type?

He sat up and scooted back on the floor. "Um, actually........."

I raised my eyebrows, waiting.

"Can I tell you a secret? You won't tell, right? Sorry, was that mean? I'm just... um I'm gay. I mean I think so, I'm pretty sure. I mean I haven't really.... well, does that bother you?"

He looked so vulnerable and all I wanted to do was laugh in relief. I shook my head no and pointed to my chest.

"You're not. Okay. I mean, I wasn't---"

I waved my hand to get his attention and pointed to myself, nodding yes this time. Then I pointed to him, and back at me. I gave up and wrote, I couldn't risk him not understanding me. I meant it doesn't bother me because I am too.

"Thank Beyoncé! I was hoping but.... okay. Cool." Finally a smile reappeared on his face.

Do your parents know?

"No, they don't. A few people but not them, yet. Yours?"

I shook my head no.

"So um, Trig? No, wait, you owe me a song. Please?"

If you ace the test Monday, I'll sing for you.

"But we won't get the grades back until at least Wednesday, maybe Thursday! No, please?"

He had the most adorable pout. Still, I didn't feel comfortable with the song yet and I couldn't just jump into it.

"If I sing my part, will you join in the chorus? I just want to hear you" he practically begged. He saw me wavering. "I was so brave, come on, please? It can be my 'coming out to a practical stranger in HIS house' award."

I chuckled, mostly because he was right. Then, after making him wait and beg just another second, I nodded. If you sing though. I don't know it well enough to do alone yet. I'd heard him sing this song a few times last week, but it was still damn pretty. He had a very melodic baritone, nice and rich, and an amazing range. We were halfway through the chorus when he stopped singing. I managed to make it to the end of the line, but then I stopped too, there just weren't any more words in my head.

"Wow. Oh wow! You're amazing Asher!"

There were a million things I wanted to say and the feeling hit me like a rock. I couldn't though, I couldn't tell him 'so were you' or 'you're just saying that' or 'sing it again and don't stop this time so we can finish it'. Well actually, I could. I could say ONE of those things, but not all. I had to pick and choose which was most important because by the time I had written it out and he had responded, the moment would be gone. And that was honestly the most devastating part about being mute; the limitations when life was happening and I couldn't quite catch up.

"Are you okay?"

I hadn't expected that, I liked to think that I was as closed off as I felt. I thought my mask was better than that. I nodded yes, but it was a small nod, and I couldn't quite force myself to smile.

"It's okay... if you're not, I mean. It's great if you are but if not, that's fine too. Want me to go?"

NO!! It's fine, besides, we haven't even started.

"Trig then?"