Mute Songbird (boyxboy) -Complete-

All alone together

*** PG-13 - Rish? Closer to R? You can absolutely skip this chapter.

Right then, when the air was heavy with anticipation, I realized that we had NO idea what to do. I sort of knew endgame, but I didn't know how to get there. I wasn't even sure if we were going THERE yet. This wasn't a straight movie, the normal 1st and 2nd bases didn't work. And it sure as hell wasn't a gay porn where one of us was going to just get our clothes ripped off and get right down to business.

I guess when I thought about doing well, anything, I always figured the other guy would know what he was doing. Not a good plan, but it was all I had. Right now I was hoping Dan knew more than he admitted. I was absolutely 110% unprepared. It probably wouldn't have bothered me so much if it didn't matter but this was huge and completely overwhelming. Not that I wanted my first time to not matter, but if it wasn't Dan and I made a fool of myself, I probably wouldn't care so much.

"We're probably both WAY overthinking this" Dan said, reading my mind yet again. "Can I just kiss you? And we'll see what happens? Does that work?" He reached over and took my hand. "I just want to be close without worrying about getting walked in on or getting eaten alive by bugs. If we just kiss and then watch a movie, that's okay, I promise. I don't want you to rush just because of the therapy."

What do you mean?

"Just, we can't do anything then, right? Until you can use words... I wouldn't do anything if you couldn't tell me things."

Oh no, there was NO way I was waiting for this until after therapy. I want to do more than kiss you.

"You do? Good, me too." He scooted over closer and turned to his side so that he was almost pressed up against me. "I have um, whatever we might need. My sister hooked me up. In case you were worried about that stuff."

I hadn't been, that's how absolutely clueless I was.  I mean, I knew we needed protection and stuff but it hadn't crossed my mind yet. 'Thanks' I signed, then rolled towards him slightly so I could kiss him. It was late and we should have both been tired but sleep was the last thing on my mind once his lips touched mine. We kissed for what felt like hours, in every position possible. I loved him above me, his biceps straining as he held himself up.

Our shirts quickly disappeared but pants felt like a huge step. I tentatively reached for his waistband but changed my mind and undid my button instead. I wasn't quite brave enough to touch him yet. I knew he was waiting for me and even though I hated that I had to do things first, it was sweet.

"Do you want those off?" When I nodded he asked "Can I do it?" He sat back, then slowly slid down my zipper like he was unwrapping a Christmas present and wanted to save the paper.

I was so nervous. I had seen enough photos on Tumblr to know that my anatomy was just fine, but I had no idea if HE would like it. We were so physically different and I felt shy. He didn't mess with my underwear though, just slipped my pants down and threw them towards the chair.

I watched him have an internal debate with himself but he ended up laying beside me again, his hands safely above my waist. He'd kissed my neck earlier, driving me crazy, but this time he didn't stop there and return to my lips. He went down further and flicked his tongue across my nipple. He looked up at me to see my reaction but was already smiling because my hips had given me away. I nodded before practically pushing his head back towards my chest. I wanted more of that.

I could feel his c0ck against my leg, he was pressed up against me and he made amazing noises whenever I moved my hips. "Asher? Can I? Do you want?" He raised up so he could see me, then gently rubbed the palm of his hand over me.

I bucked my hips up, wanting more pressure and nodded. He was back at my collarbones, then my lips as his palm continued to bring me closer. I didn't know if I should come, I didn't think he'd mind but I had no idea if I was ruining some grand plan and I didn't want to stop things and ask. I just wanted more. I wanted to feel his skin, I wanted his fingers wrapped around me, I wanted more of everything.

One of my hands ended up at the waistband of my boxer briefs and I dipped my thumb under and lifted, freeing myself before pushing them down slightly.

Dan broke the kiss off and smiled down at me. "Can I try to make you feel good? I want to touch you."

Absolutely. I grabbed his hand in a moment of bravery and moved it, overwhelmed when fingers that weren't mine closed around me. It felt amazing and much different than usual; so weird but in the best way possible. It felt surreal, like I wasn't quite in my body any more. I stared into his light eyes, silently begging him for whatever he was willing to offer.

"You feel so good in my hand. You're perfect" he whispered against my lips. "Is this okay?"

It was wonderful, if not a little bit too gentle. He was being careful with me but I was so close that I wanted more. I grabbed his hair and pulled him towards me, kissing him hard. He took the hint and it wasn't long before my need overcame my shyness and I coated my stomach, panting and hoping I hadn't sounded like an idiot.