Rebel (SVU Fanfic)

18

"Nicole woke up and felt massive pain in her head. When she tried to move her hand, it hurt worse. That's when she noticed she was in a hospital room.

And twenty minutes later, Olivia and the squad came in to tell her what had happened."

Nicole felt tears on her face as she let the flashback fade away from her.

Her father had been arrested for abuse of a minor and his wife, endangering the welfare of a minor - three minors, and assault with a weapon.

He was sentenced 25 years, with no parole.

And now, they had a letter from him?! What the he did he want?!

Nicole reached her hand up to the back of her neck, just below where her hair started and felt the disruption in the skin. That's where they cut her open to make sure there wasn't any swelling. She survived without being paralyzed, which no doctor predicted. She should be paralyzed from the waist down because of how her father threw her. But she still is completely mobile.

Benson Miracle, the hospital dubbed her.

Her hand felt where there wasn't hair any longer. Thank goodness it was below all the rest of her hair, so it didn't look odd unless Nicole wore her hair up.

That's precisely why she never wore her hair up.

She heard the front door open and froze. Why was her mother already home?!

"Hey, I'm home!"

Nicole heard footsteps and knew her brother and sister were racing to their mom. Nicole stayed put in fear that her brother and sister would see her.

"Nicki?" Olivia asked, heading towards her girls' room.

The door opened and there sat Nicole.

Closing the door immediately behind her, Olivia asked, "Nicole, what's wrong?!"

Unable to speak correctly through hiccup cries, she said, "We...gotta...l-letter...from...Dad!"

Peter.

Olivia's stomach dropped to the bottom floor of their apartment building.

"What did it say?"

"I didn't read it. I left it on the counter!"

Olivia hugged her daughter and kissed her head.

"I'll go see."

Olivia ventured out to the envelope and opened it. 5 pieces of paper, she counted She then read the first one. Very few words.

I have written a letter for each of you. I want for Olivia to read them first. Since you always get the mail, I assume that won't be a problem.

Olivia's heart sank. Ever since she moved them out here, Nicole got the mail. But Peter wouldn't have known that.

She put the page down and went to the first one.

Paige,
My baby girl. My littlest girl. You'll never known who I was. Or am. You'll be having a family of your own before I get out of jail for what I did. If you ever ask your mother about me, and she tells you the truth, you'll automatically hate me. And that's...that's the way it has to be.

Maybe she'll show you this letter. Paigey, me and your mother went at each other like we were in a war. I cut her with a knife. I threw your sister into a wall so hard she was knocked unconscious and needed surgery. You and Zach were in Nicole's room. Thankfully.

I love you. If you know anything about me, know I'm not the man you'll hear about. Anymore. You do have a father who loves you.

Dad.

Olivia, disgusted, smashed the paper on the countertop. Zach was next.

Zach,
The "Little Man". That's what everyone at Mom's Jersey precinct called you.
And it was a good fit. Like me in every good way. The exact opposite in all my bad ways.

You'll have my temper, trust me. Control it. With all our power. You'll grow up in a family of women, they'll test you. You're stronger than that.

And any girl you ever meet. Find her and never let her go. No matter how hard she tries to run. Love her like nothing else.

Watch over the women in the house for me, alright? I know you can do it.

Dad.

That letter was way less disgusting. He made it about Zach, not himself. And gave advice that was legitimate.

Nicole,
Why am I ever writing to you? You would hang me by my thumbs and torture me with everything you had. You're all your mother, and that's something to love. Protect what you have, what you love. You're a strong, independent, no bullshit, free-living, even rebellious kid. The perfect kid.

You don't care, though, do you? I bet your mom won't even give you this letter. I'm okay with that.

I'm okay if you want me to go kill myself. I deserve it. I deserve to rot in this cell.

And no, that's not for pity. I don't need it. I don't deserve it.

But you do deserve a father. If your mother finds someone, make sure they're the right one. Watch over her. She never had anyone to watch over her.

I won't be your father because I know you don't want me to. But I'll be here.

I love you.

Dad.

Olivia wasn't sure what to think about that. He doesn't need to be her father? What kind of apology is that?!

But he did have a point. Nicole never wanted anything to do with him.

Against all rejections she had going on in her head, she went to Nicole's room. Nicole had managed to fall asleep in the five minutes Olivia had been gone.

Olivia put the tri-folded up letter on Nicole's bedside table.

When she left the room, she took a look at her letter. It was even shorter than the introduction paper. And he didn't even address it to her. Well, he didn't need to.

I'm sorry.
Find someone to love you more than I ever did. You deserve to be loved.
And don't ever run from it.

He didn't sign his name on there either.

Again, he didn't have to.

She reread over the letter. As she did, Elliot came to her mind.

And as she began to think about him, she heard her phone ring.