Fierce Love

Chapter 20: Lilly

That stupid, idiotic jerk! How could he do this?! How could he just kiss me?

All these questions circled my mind as my feet carried me as far as I possibly can away from that motel. I don't care if you call this running away from your problems or whatever but I can't just face Nate after I made out with him.

Time lost meaning as I ran and ran replaying the recent memory of what just happened. My legs burned but I wouldn't stop.

I wasn't running from Nate I was running from myself.

I could feel a slight buzzing in my shirt's pocket, it was Ryan, probably worried sick about me. He worries too much for his own good. As I slowed down to catch my breath, I came across a park with a few people who gave me the "what-the-hell-is-wrong-with-her?" stare but, could you blame them. Nate kind of caught me of guard so I was running barefoot on the slightly wet tarmac and I was just in one of Ryan's oversized T-shirts. My hair was another thing you all could probably imagine what it looks like!

As I sat on one of the swings, I kept thinking about Nate and how he found me. A private investigator?! Such a Nate thing to do. I will kill him the next time I see him for that. That's if he doesn't kiss you first. My twisted subconscious retorted. I huffed as I started swinging and was intoxicated by the memory of my dad and I in the park. How he'd always push me on those swings and help me on the slide. Traitorous tears sprung to my eyes but I pushed them back. I promised myself that I won't cry over anything ever again.

My moment of bliss was rudely interrupted by the continuous buzzing of my phone. I fished it out of my pocket to see that it was Xavier calling me and I suddenly felt a wave of nausea wash over me. something wasn't right.

"Lilly, Thank God you answe-" Xavier said frantically.

"Xavier, what is it? What happened?" I answered calmly.

"It's Nate!" Xavier chocked out, sounding on the verge of tears.

I felt a tug at my heart as I stood up straight, "What's with Nate? He was just here with me. We were talking!"

"He got into a car accident!" he croaked.

My eyes widened as my world stopped spinning. You never really know the importance of a person and how close they are to you till they are taken away from you. I pray that with Nate this won't be the case because I'm not ready to lose anyone else, especially a close friend. Yea, because friends kiss each other. My stupid mind added. Okay, to be honest, I'm not sure what are we after that kiss.

After intensive directions from Xavier and me getting pretty close to an "epic" meltdown as stated by Xavier, I reached the hospital he was admitted in.

Fortunately, I passed by the motel, explained everything to Ryan and grabbed something decent to wear; skinny jeans and a tank top. I tried to take Ryan's leather jacket but he wouldn't give it to me. No idea why.

When I reached the automatic slide doors of the emergency, I froze. Too many bad memories turn away that's what my brain was telling the rest of my body, but I had to go in there for Nate. I'm sure he would do the same for me.

As I took my first steps into the God forsaken place, my senses were assaulted by everything around me. The strong smell of detergents and antiseptics made me cough as it filled my lungs and the light-saving bulbs that covered every inch of the ceiling almost blinded me. In the background, you could hear the bantering of nurses, the bleeping of ventilators, the wails and laughs of some of the patients' families. I was going to have a panic attack in front of all those people, I had to get out of here. I ran to the receptionist and clung to the marbled surface to try and hold myself together.