Kavi

13. Im sorry

Kirstie was still crying into Scott's shoulder. He was also shocked from the news that she had given. Scott let go of Kirstie and she turned to face Avi. She waited a second and then reached out to hug him but he back away from her.
"Avi, I'm sorry. I didn't mean-"
"Stop. I don't want to hear excuses. You're just like him. You cheated on me Kirstie."
"I didn't mean to Avi, I still love you!"
"How did you not mean to if you wanted it!? You could've said no and left!"
"I tried!"
"I'm sure you did, considering you guys fucked. I'm out of here."
"Wait Avi, please!"
Avi left Scott's slamming the door and driving back to his apartment. When he walked in, he punched the wall with anger and made a hole. He sat on his couch and stared blankly at the hole he created. How could she? She said they were just going to talk and she would come back after. Not fuck her ex and cheat on Avi... maybe he was overthinking. He hadn't been this angry in a while and wasn't thinking straight. He loved Kirstie and she shattered his heart like Jeremy did to her. All he wanted to do was forget about it. So he got some alcohol and sat in silence.
Kirstie on the other hand was still at Scott's and wouldn't stop crying. She felt so guilty and super angry at herself and Jeremy. Maybe she did still love Jeremy. No stop Kirstie, you love Avi. But you broke his heart, you're worthless, no guy wants you. Her mind was racing and she decided there was one thing she had to do. Scott was sitting in the living room waiting for Kirstie to come out of her room. He heard the door open and saw her walk to the bathroom. He expected her to come out soon and come sit with him but she was taking longer than usually. He got up and went over to the door.
"Kirstie? Are you ok?"
She wouldn't answer and he asked again.
"Kirstie, are you hurt? Please answer me."
He tried the door but it was locked.
"Kirstie open the door!!"
"No Scott..."
He was relieved to hear her voice but wasn't sure if she was exactly 'ok'.
"Please Kirstin, I only want to help."
He heard the lock click and he turned the knob. What he saw was something he didn't expect. Kirstie was sitting on the floor with blood on her wrist. There were only 3 cuts but they weren't the smallest. Kirstie was in shock and just looked up at Scott who was also in shock.
"Help me.."
Kirstie barely whispered.
"Come here sweetie."
Scott bent down and picked her up bridal style and sat her down on the sink. He turned her arm. And looked at the cuts.
"Kirstie.. why did you do this?"
"No one loves me Scott, I'm a worthless piece of shit. I have sex with my ex boyfriend and cheat on people. Who could love that?"
"I still love you Kirstin, I'm not completely over what you did, but I still love you."
He cleaned her wounds and wrapped them up in bandages. He picked her back up and carried her into the living and sat her down on his lap on the couch.
"Kirst, promise you won't ever do this again."
He kissed her cheek and she turned to him.
"I promise Scott."
She hugged him with everything she had and said,
"You're the only one who still loves me."
"That's not true, I'm sure Avi still loves you. He just needs to process what happened and find how he feels about it."
"What if he doesn't want to be with me, who am I supposed to go to?"
"I'll always be here for you Kirstie."
She took that the wrong way and Scott wasn't intending it to sound that way, but she looked at him and kissed him right on the mouth. At first he was shocked but then regained his composure. He pushed her off of him.
"Kirstie, that's not what I meant."
"I'm sorry, I just need to feel something."
"Maybe you should go talk to Avi. He probably needs to feel something too."
"Will you drive me over there?"
"Yes but I'm not going to stay, if you want to come back or if something happens, call me."
"Ok."
Scott drove Kirstie over to Avi's and left. She was all alone and standing in front of Avi's door. She knocked gently and Avi opened slowly. When he saw who it was he started to close the door again but Kirstie stopped it.
"Avi, wait."
"What do you want Kirstin?"
"I need you."
"Go tell Jeremy that...you probably already did anyway."
"Could you please let me talk to you!?"
"I don't want to talk to you! You shattered my heart!"
"And I came to fix it."
"I don't think that's possible. You went the furthest that cheating goes and that can't be taken back. People don't change."
"I can change for you. I love you."
"You really think I can believe you right now?"
"Look Avi, look what I did because of this, you're not the only one who's broken!"
She put her wrist up and exposed the cuts to him. He saw what she did and let her in.
"I feel so guilty that I did this to you. I didn't know how to handle it, except through this. That was the only way the pain would go away. I know this is going to sound bad but... I kissed Scott. He was the only one who made me feel something and I craved it. He pushed me away and said that I should come talk to you. I know you need to feel something too, and I'm here to give it to you. I'm sorry Avi, I love you."
She waited as Avi took all of this in and thought of how to answer. All he could do was stare at her.
"Are you going to say something? Will you please say something?"
He grabbed her hands and kissed her on the forehead.
"I'm sorry too."
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To be continued