Stuck - Larry Stylinson

Chapter 22

"Say when and 
my two arms 
will carry you, 
tonight, tonight"

Louis' POV

I hadn’t seen Harry in a couple of days and it was so depressing. I missed him and when he finally came around we shared a lot of kisses and I was just happy. He made me happy and I loved it. I loved the feeling I got when he looked at me, talked to me, smiled at me, kissed me and held me. It was all just amazing. But lately his eyes has seemed duller and his smile unsure. Sometimes it looked like he would just fade away and disappear. It was scary, really.

Weeks pasted fast and I saw Harry less and less. I was confused and scared. He was just disappearing and it was just too much. I told my Therapist this and for some reason she just smiled sadly at me and asked another question. I was so confused, but when I thought about it I had been confused the most of the time I had known Harry. It had always been something off about it, something that wasn’t quite right but I just couldn’t put my finger on it.

But I think I nailed it when I heard Niall and Liam talk a few steps away from me. They talked about Harry and the fact that he’d leave this place next week. I could feel my heart stop right then and there. Harry couldn’t leave! I just got him. I couldn’t live without him. I needed him, why hadn’t he told me about it? Why had he acted like we could have this forever when in reality he would leave in just some days? It was not fair.

But that explained somewhat why everything had been off, why everything had felt like a dream. It was because it wasn’t real, Harry would leave like everyone else. I quickly walked back to my room and sat down in the middle of it and it all just felt wrong. Harry couldn’t leave me. He couldn’t.

It knocked at my door and before I could answer Harry opened the door and sat down beside me. Why hadn’t he told me? Were there more things he kept from me?

“Are you alright, love?” Harry asked and I shook my head.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” I asked, my voice quiet.

“I..uhm. What are you talking about? I’ve told you everything that is worth to know.” Harry said and I shook my head again.

“So it’s not worth to tell me that you are leaving me in a week?” I asked accusingly.

“Louis…”

“No Harry, all this time you’ve told me that you wouldn’t leave me! Were you ever going to tell me or would you just leave so once I woke up that day you would be gone? Was that your plan?” I asked a bit too harshly and Harry looked at me with sad eyes.

“You still don’t get it. But Louis, you did realize before that I wasn’t going to stay forever, you knew I would leave sooner or later.” It was true, I had known that no matter how much I wanted it, Harry couldn’t stay. This wasn’t his life. But even thought I knew that it hurt to get to hear it in reality. So I shook my head. “You’re not fooling anyone Louis, but it’ll be better this way. You will get better without me and you know that too.”

“I won’t get better without you! I need you!” I nearly screamed and Harry shook his head. His form was getting fuzzy and I blinked once to get him in focus again.

“I’m sorry Louis.” He said and gave me a quick kiss before he left me alone. More confused than ever. How could I get better without Harry when he had been the one thing keeping me sane the latest months? What did he mean by it? Maybe it was just his way telling me that he was tired of me and that he didn’t care about me anymore.

But somewhere deep inside I knew Harry was right, I could only get better if I let go of him. It was time.