To Believe In Promises (Tumbling Down trilogy - DM fanfic)

Mother (Ch.20)

I'm not supposed to call him on Skype. I don't know his schedule and he has to call me. So I send a message.

"I feel like Tori should tell you, but I guess I will for her. Call me when you can."

Could I be any more vague? Whatever. He'll answer when he gets the chance.

Until then, I'll stay with Tori. Mary tells us dinner is ready so we both get a plate. Tori has a significantly smaller portion of everything. Mary notices.

Mary: Is that all you're gonna eat? Are you sick?
Tori: I'm fine.

Her mother catches my eye, and I know she wants to talk to me.

Me: Well, I have to pee. Tori, go up without me. I'll be right there.

She nods and rushes up the stairs.

Mary: Is something the matter with her?
Me: Not that I know. I think she just misses her bother.
Mary: He's coming home in a few days. I don't get why-
Me: I figured this all out already. After Matt died, Tyler took care of her, correct?

Mary nods.

Me: Well all she knows now is Tyler taking care of her. And he's gone now. She's scared of losing him like she lost Matt. And she barely remembers him as it is.

Mary nods, understanding.

Mary: Matt was a great dad. They all miss him, but I think it hit Tyler and Tori the hardest.
Me: Why Tori?
Mary: Well, Mark doesn't give a shit about anything. You know that. And Jessie had already been 20 when Matt died. Tori missed growing up with a father. I'm not saying Jess doesn't miss him, but she's got an entire childhood with her dad to remember. Tori doesn't remember much about him at all. And Tyler. They were so close.

I nod.

Me: He told me all about that.
Mary: Was it to prove a point? He never wanted to talk about his father.
Me: I asked him about his guitar. I was curious and I guess he was pissed enough to tell me.
Mary: Sounds like Tyler.

I nod, smirking a little.

Mary: You're good for him, you know.
Me: In what ways?
Mary: Well for one, you got him to care about more than football and Tori.
Me: Getting a 16 year old to care about his sister at all is impressive. I had nothing to do with that.
Mary: Fine. How's being his first girlfriend that wasn't blonde?
Me: That's...alright I guess.
Mary: His grades went up. A little. He wanted to be home more. He seemed happier.

A smile crosses my face, even though he helped me way more than I helped him. I think, anyways.

I look at the food that I haven't touched on my plate, even as we've been talking. It looks so unappealing now, my nausea coming back.

Mary: Are you okay?

I shake my head.

Me: I've been feeling sick on and do for like...a while now.
Mary: What's "a while"?
Me: Few weeks.
Mary: Fever or anything like that?
Me: No. Just a little tired. Thought it was the flu at first but not anymore.

It makes me nervous that it seems she knows exactly what's happening.

Mary: Anything else? Changes that seem weird to you?

Me: I threw up once after I smelled my roommate's Chinese. My shoes didn't fit either. I chalked that up to just getting fat, though.
Mary: Why you would ever consider yourself fat, I'll never know, bu-
Me: Well I was on the pill. I got off of it because of that.

An uncomfortable silence fills the room.

Me: What?
Mary: I'm going to go out on a limb and say you and Tyler have had sex before.

I feel my heartbeat in my ears. I can't confirm or deny, just out of pure shock and fear.

Me: And...?
Mary: It's safe to say you could be pregnant.
Me: No. I'm not. I can't be.
Mary: I've been pregnant four times. I would know.

I have those same feelings of anxiety and panic that I had about a year ago. But that was because I waited too long to read the test and it turned up a false positive. And all my stress caused me to overwork and throw up.

Me: But...I-I thought...
Mary: You'll have to take a test to be sure, but I'm convinced.

Heat forms behind my eyes but I suppress tears. I can't be pregnant. Tyler's gone. He won't be here with me.

Why am I so stupid?

Me(quietly): No...

Mary hugs me, but I don't want her to. I want Tyler to hug me.

~•~

Beep beep.
Beep beep.
Beep beep...

The incoming Skype call keeps ringing. I question if I should answer it.

I do anyways. And Tyler's face pops up, instantly growing with concern.

Ugh, why'd he have to call like twenty minutes after I went home. I just got over crying. Obviously the redness is still there.

Tyler: So I just talked to my sister and my mom. What the hell is going on over there?
Me: I have no idea.

I avert my eyes.

Tyler: Seriously?

I nod slowly.

Tyler: Well Tori was upset about something, and was confused why you left so randomly. My mom told me I had to talk to you. And I got your message earlier.

Fuuuuck.

Well, I could always make Tori my excuse...

But he has to know!
But what if I'm not pregnant?
Don't tell him until you're sure!

I decide on that and turn my attention to Tori.

Me: Fine. I figured out why Tori doesn't want to go to that camp.
Tyler: Why?
Me: Some girls from that camp are bullying her. But she didn't want anyone except you to know first.
Tyler: How'd you find out?
Me: I opened her laptop and the chat was open.
Tyler: What were they saying?
Me: Does it really matter? It's been going on for awhile. I never saw it. I'm supposed to watch her. A-
Tyler: Mackenzie, calm down.
Me: I can't. What if she ends up like me?
Tyler: I can guarantee she won't. She's gonna be fine.
Me: How? How do you know that?
Tyler: Because you won't let her. You will not let Tori hide it, get near a razor, or sit alone and cry about it. You'll hunt down these girls and beat them up for her. I trust you.
Me: How comforting.

Tyler stays quiet for a couple seconds.

Tyler: I'll be home soon enough, okay? If she doesn't want to talk to you about it. But-
Me: That's the point! Nobody who gets targeted wants to talk about it!
Tyler: Out of anyone, she's going to choose me and you to talk to. But besides Tori, my mom said something was going on with you too.
Me: There's nothing going on with me.

Why did Mary say something?! Ugh.

Tyler: She seemed pretty sure about it.
Me: I'm fine, okay?
Tyler: Okay, Tori.
Me: Hey! You know, she was right. Getting asked all the time about life is pretty annoying.
Tyler: Okay, fine. I'll be home in 3 days. I can figure it out then.
Me: Wait, what?
Tyler: You have 72 hours to figure out whatever bad news you have to tell me. I have to go.
Me: Okay.
Tyler: I love you.
Me: I love you too. Bye.

I hang up, closing my laptop, facing back into a world of tears.

He already knows I have bad news.
Bad news.
I can't have this baby.