To Believe In Promises (Tumbling Down trilogy - DM fanfic)

Before Anything Happens (Ch.19)

The nausea isn't going away.

I have to go to my classes, so I do, hoping and praying not to throw up in any of them.

It's a Thursday, one week after
my initial vomiting, and my class tomorrow will more than likely be canceled. My teacher's due to leave for maternity leave any day now. She didn't want to come to class yesterday or Monday so I assume she won't want to tomorrow.

Mariah is back from her classes before me every Tuesday and Thursday, so I see her when I walk in. Almost instantly, I'm changing out of my jeans. You have to get over changing in front of people pretty quick in a dorm, so it doesn't faze me or her.

I take off my - Tyler's - sweatshirt after that, leaving me in just a sports bra because I decided I didn't want to wear a shirt. I groan.

Me: This stupid bra doesn't fit anymore.

Mariah comes over.

Mariah: Damn, I'm surprised it fit at all. You didn't notice that it was too small?
Me: It was fine until like...yesterday. Ugh, what the fuck.

I change into a different bra, and that one doesn't fit either, but it's not as constricting. But everything, I've noticed, doesn't fit right. My shoes don't fit, which is weird because my feet have been a size 6 for the last 4 years. And I hate my jeans, which is also new. Jeans were my favorite thing ever to wear.

Me: I think I need to get off the pill.
Mariah: What? Do you miss having your period?

That also happened, but I'm not alarmed by it. Ever since I got on the pill, my periods have been super light. Sometimes they don't even come. It's alright in my book, though.

Me: Hah! No. I just got mine, though. That's not the point. I'm getting fat.
Mariah: If you're fat, what does that make me?
Me: You aren't fat.
Mariah: Mhm. Sure.

I roll my eyes.

Mariah: Looks like you can live in the non-size-zero world now.
Me: These jeans are a size 3. Just saying.

It's Mariah's turn to roll her eyes.

Mariah: Maybe that boyfriend of yours knows what's up.
Me: That boyfriend of mine won't be home until like...Easter.

And it's a very slow crawl to Easter
indeed. 5 more weeks.

But I get out of school a week earlier than that, so I go home.

Tori knows I'm back in Pennsylvania so I'm over at the Stanton house pretty much as soon as I drop off my bags. But she's in 8th grade; she's still in school until Thursday. Right now she's got her algebra book in her lap, looking as confused as ever.

Me: What's up?
Tori: I don't get this! Why the hell did I let my mom think I'm smart?
Me: It'll help in the long run. You can always say you're smarter than your brothers.
Tori: That's not hard to do, though! The only reason Tyler's grades went up was you.
Me: He was at a C+ average for all of high school.
Tori: He was about to fail math until his Sophomore year.
Me: He wouldn't have let that happen. Football was too big for him.
Tori: Seems too coincidental for me.

I roll my eyes, scooting closer to her.

Me: So what don't you understand?
Tori: Everything.

That sure is helpful. I take her laptop off her desk.

Me: So this is when you consult the Internet.

I open the lid and the screen lights up. Tori doesn't seem to be paying attention until her Facebook opens up. Out of the corner of my eye, I watch her face go pale.