When you wish upon a star

Chapter 7

Kelly's POV~

"I wish i was loved." i whispered and leaned my head against the wall of my house, shutting my eyes. For a few seconds i felt peaceful. everything was quiet. however that was so rudely interrupted by my father pounding on my bedroom door. "Kelly! time for dinner!" he shouted. Quickly, i climbed back in the window and walked over to the door. "ok i'll be right out." I said without letting him in. "hurry up." he snapped before walking away. "i'll take my own damn time." i muttered and walked to my bathroom. my hair was all ruffled and there were black streaks left by eyeliner and mascara mixed with tears running down my cheeks. "what a hot mess you are." i sighed and started washing up. "kelly what are you doing? we're waiting!" i heard my mother call from the living room. I didn't answer. They could wait. i had to make myself look okay first. My family asking stupid questions was not something i needed right after a breakdown. "sorry to keep you all waiting." i slumped down in my chair at the table. "are you okay?" my mother asked in the sort of fakely concerned voice only a mother can seem to perfect. "fine." i replied and forced down a few bites of my pizza. My mother didn't reply. only gave me a very disappointed look and nodded. i kept eating without saying anything. everyone seemed to have nothing to talk about tonight. I almost made a remark about their unusual silence but decided against it. after all, i did appreciate not having to listen to them. "May i be excused?" i stood up without waiting for an answer and grabbed my empty plate. "yes. oh! you actually finished!" my mother grinned. was it really that surprising? "yeah.. I did..." i shrugged and went back into my room. "nothing to do... nothing to do..." i muttered and lay flat on my back on the floor. it was kind of late, 11:39 was what my ipod clock told me. "wow... we really never do anything on a "normal" schedule." i sighed and sat up, rubbing my eyes. "maybe..." i paused to yawn and glance around. "i should go to sleep..." i said quietly to myself. to myself. thats how lonely i was. i fucking talked to myself. Shaking my head at how dumb i would have looked if anyone had been watching, i grabbed my flannel pajama pants and a hoodie. Then changed into them before crawling under my blankets. I shivered a little as a cold breeze blew in the window above my head. i would have shut it but fresh air is appreciated. especially when my parents were too stupid to turn the air conditioning on. i plugged my ipod into the charger behind my pillow then swiped across, typing in the four digit code to unlock it. Nothing on my fanpages. i would post anyway. Just in case i finally gained popularity. No text messages either. Most of my internet friends had pretty much quietly moved on. And i assumed they intended on leaving me behind. The few people i called friends whom i could actually see in real time seemed to have done the same thing. Oh well, better alone than with people who are only pretending to like you. right? i kept telling myself that. trying to pretend like i was okay with being alone. When really, i wasn't okay at all.
My eyelids started to droop and i snapped back awake when i felt my thumb hit my ipod screen. slowly and lazily, i clicked the power button then slid the little device under my pillow. Seconds later i heard the shuffling of my parents feet heading to their room down the hall. At least they didn't try to come in and check on me. or start making noises doing i don't even want to know what. After that i must have fallen asleep because the next thing i knew i was being awoken by birds screaming to the first show of sunlight outside my window. "Yes, the glowing hate orb has shown its face. Five in the morning is much too early for me to be awake. stop shrieking." i groaned and sat up just enough to slam the window shut before falling back onto my pillow and laying there. staring at my ceiling. For some reason, though i could not hear the birds now, i couldn't get back to sleep. so i climbed slowly out of bed and walked into the kitchen. trying not to melt my eyeballs out when i turned on a light. "You're up early." My father's voice came from the couch where he sat lacing up his shoes so he could leave for work. "couldn't sleep." i shrugged and grabbed a can of iced tea from the fridge. maybe the caffein would help wake me up. "what's wrong?" He asked and stood up. "nothing's wrong! what is with you and mom asking what's wrong all the time. i'm fine." i lied. i was pretty good at lying. "okay. calm down i was just... expressing parental concern." he muttered and kissed the top of my head before heading out the front door to go to work. I sank down onto the couch, placing my can of iced tea on the nightstand beside it. "Still nothing to do around here..." i muttered. staring around at my house. it was a very boring house. three bedrooms. three bathrooms. a kitchen with adjoining dining/living room and the laundry room. i suppose to someone who had never been here before it might have seemed exciting but to me it did not. nothing did. maybe some day i would feel excited about something, but today was not that day.